Hornily ambitious high school student Jake Davidson learned the hard way that if you ask Kate Upton to prom, there's a chance you'll end up going with an equally gorgeous Sports Illustrated supermodel like Nina Agdal; and inevitably spend the evening wondering why she decided on a stupid side-swept ponytail, when everyone knows that KATE WOULD HAVE WORN IT DOWN. While Jake won the celebrity-crush-replacement lottery, some high school students who reached out to their fantasy dates weren't quite as ecstatic about their stand-ins.
When Bobby initially asked for "a Kardashian," he banked on the one who was eating for two. Still, it was sweet of Kris to make time between vaginal rejuvinations.
"Mom, I don't even know this guy! Wait, wasn't he on every season of Celebrity Apprentice?? Eh, forget it. At least he brought a flask."
Kimmy dreamed of taking Ben Affleck to prom, but instead she got Roman Polanski. Even though they had a blast, they got some weird looks at the DoubleTree.