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Hairy And The Kardashians

Kim Kardashian left her pre-natal kickboxing class flat-out devastated by the disgusting news that pregnancy can stimulate hair growth. In other words, she's become a pitiful, multi-follicled monster, draped in strings of dead karatin cells, with a deplorable, expanding hump protruding from her stomach. Kim's dedicated years of her life to laser hair removal just so she can remind people of the texture of roll-on deodorant.  And now she has to sacrifice all of that, just to bring a new life into this wretched, ever-ovulating world. Sadly, the despicable transformation cannot be altered with the Valencia filter on Instagram.

For Bobo from Finding Bigfoot, this discovery was bittersweet. He always knew the Sasquatch would be a fan of Lululemon.  But he also imagined he'd be the first to get actually get her pregnant. It just goes to show, good things happen when you least expect them, or are masturbating outside of an Equinox in night goggles.

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