Between flexing his obliques and sharpening his teeth on gold medals, it's amazing Ryan Lochte found time to shoot a reality show for E! I guess all those years of keeping up with the Kardashians were training the network for the blistering-fast dial-up modem speed of Lochte's world. The series promises to reveal the complex mind behind the glazed-over stare, a mind so raw and clay-like it even invented its own language.
But is the world ready to decipher the key to Lochte? I'm not sure they are.