We know you're busy emptying your bank account on snazzy items from Home Shopping Network's Mariah Carey Collection (try the udder balm—you won't be sorry), but why not take a break and catch up on this week's finest moments in Soup?
1. Paranormal Challenge: Though interacting with terrifying spirits of the undead is what this show's all about, apparently no one's afraid of an encounter with host Zak Bagan's balls.
Keep going. Four more chances to snort.
2. The Bachelorette: Swingin' man chaser Ashley Hebert and lucky stud Ben have a special treat in store: Chris Harrison has given them the key to the Fantasy Suite. And there's more in the room than a bottle of lotion and a mirror on the ceiling.
3. Man vs. Wild: What's more fun than watching a naked survivalist accidentally scald his junk? If you find out, let us know.