When it comes to the dispensation of provocative advice, leave Kim Kardashian out of it.
"Do you guys realize that most of our fans are under the age of 18 and that you guys are bad influences?" the E! star reminded sisters Kourtney and Khloé during their appearance on Conan tonight.
"Kim is horrified by us," Kourtney said proudly.
Surely that has nothing to do with mayonnaise and vaginas.
"Talking about putting mayonnaise on your thing," Kim said, gesturing downward, "is not appropriate advice."
"Honestly, women need to know how to take care of their stuff," Khloé insisted innocently, referring to a bit of sisterly humor featured on Keeping Up With the Kardashians.
"It's a joke and they've never done it," Kim assured the audience and a very intrigued Conan O'Brien.
"How do you know?" retorted Khloé.
"People asked us, 'What does mayonnaise on your vagina do?" Kourtney helpfully explained. "And we said it makes it shine like the top of the Chrysler Building. And people were like, 'Why would you want a shiny vagina anyways?"
"I don't know, uh..." replied Conan. "Wow, anyway..."
"Wait, that was a joke?!" Andy Richter chimed in, obviously outraged. "Great. I'm going to need some time during the commercial break."
The ladies also reminisced about some of the product endorsements they've had to turn down: Kourtney nixed a personal lubrianct deal. Kim won't do butt-enhancement pills. And Khloé and hubby Lamar Odom opted not to put their names on a custom line of sex toys—even though mom Kris Jenner made quite the pitch.
"She just wants 10 percent, she really doesn't care," Khloé said.