You want to be strong but innocent-looking, demure but sway-a-judge sexy and wealthy enough to afford a powerful lawyer, but not so wealthy that you can afford more court! And people think the Oscars are tricky...
So how do two of America's favorite enemies of the law shape up in their most recent catwalk to the court house?
Mamma Lohan made some very odd choices. Between the black bell bottoms, heavy sweater and floral Saturday Night Fever shirt, she sort of looks like our grandma got dressed from the contents of her storage closet. We'd still call this better than all of Lindsay Lohan's court looks combined, but that's not saying much.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey star stayed true to her gawdy roots with a puffy purple overcoat. We're not sure luxurious outerwear in a regal color says, "sorry I committed fraud," but if you're going down, you may as well do it in over-dramatic style, with an absolutely perfect blowout.
We call Teresa the easy winner here. Agree or disagree?