Gary Gershoff/WireImageBefore you spam our comments section with verbal crucifixions about why we're slamming Natalie Portman, one of the prettiest gals in the biz, let us explain. You can at least grant us a few last words before you march us off to die.
Yes, every square inch of this Oscar-winning actress is stunning.
Sure, her makeup job—which includes a shimmery pink lip, flawless cheeks and a slightly smoky eye—is spot on.
Of course, the Christian Dior navy silk gown is fab too. The mother of baby boy Aleph wore the ruffly, belted number during a recent visit to the New York City Ballet's Spring Gala in New York.
But call this another episode of Right Dress, Wrong Gal. Portman is perfect. The gown is matchless. But together, they cancel each other out like light and dark matter crashing into each other in deep space.
The tiered skirt is just too full, and it swallows the 5-foot-3-inch pixie whole. Here, a gorgeous 30-year-old woman looks about as tall as a Smurf, and if that isn't a fashion crime, we don't know what is.
OK. We're ready to face the death squad now. Thanks for listening.