Morning Piss: Prissy Phelps, Get a Friggin’ Grip!
ZumaPress.com
Since NBC was only too happy to send out a press release (I swear, Paris Hilton farts, there's a press release these days, but whatever) regarding Michael Phelps's pathetic, humble-pie apology to Matt Lauer for having smoked pot, I'm sure you're aware of the cry-baby quotes. If not, here they are:
"It was a bad mistake," moaned Phelps to Lauer during the interview set to air March 15. "You know, bad judgment. And it's something that, you know, I have to, and I want to, teach other people not to make that mistake."
Excuse me? How much longer is this country—including its puritanical '50s-era media cops like Lauer, who grills Phelps relentlessly like he's hit a child or something—going to torture this kid, who happens to be an athletic hero?
It's utterly wrong, demoralizing and disgusting to have to watch Phelps continue to squirm like this. Why aren't the heads of the banks that got us into this horrible economic crisis being hunted with the same moralistic fervor? Or Chris Brown? Now there are some actions worth hanging folks out to bleed for, not this.
Wake up, idiot America.
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