Blind Vice: Sloppy Sluts Unite!

Slurpa Pop-Off and Morgan Mayhem decide a united front is best

By Ted Casablanca Aug 02, 2011 12:26 PMTags
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I guess Slurpa Pop-Off and Morgan Mayhem didn't get the memo. Tooling around Hollywood in outrageously expensive wheels while enjoying low-rent screws and buckets of cocaine is just so, well, 2006.

Girls, can't you hip it up better than that?

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Guess not. And it's getting worse: Morgan and Slurpa, who both used to be two of the most successful young businesswomen in Hollywood (no joke) have seen their earnings reports...well, they aren't exactly sky-rocketing lately.

Which is a shame, because both these gals were the original crafty chick—in every way. Now, they can't even get invited to a decent Hollywood party.

So, what are two former It girls supposed to do? Band together, that's what!

Slurpa and Morgs—totally high—are now crashing A-list parties together, tripping, falling, purses opening and spilling everywhere. It's pretty sad.

"They think they're so funny," lamented one horrified guest at a Hollywood Hills bash the two girls invited themselves to recently. "But it's just pathetic. People didn't even recognize them at first. And then, it's like, once you realize who they are, please."

As one of the shocked onlookers said, "Even Nicole Richie cleaned up her act, come on!"

But reform has always been a dirty word to Morgs and Slurp. Which, actually, is part of their charm. The problem being, however, is that the naughty chemicals are starting to run the show for Pop-Off and Mayhem—like they did with Charlie Sheen. And it's boring as crap.

Not to mention as dangerous as Amy Winehouse's situation.

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