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Blind Vice! Lovey-Dovey Couple About to Call It Quits!

Fri., Aug. 19, 2011 5:12 AM PDT by Ted Casablanca

Carol Anne Sausage-Snatcher is having some trouble in paradise.

But at least she'll have someone to commiserate about her romance troubles with ‘cause, in case you didn't know, she's practically besties with Carmelita Salami-Climber. And rightfully so, they're cut from the same juicy pig, if you catch my drift.

Well, while Carm thinks she's in BF heaven, Carol is in relationship hell...

‘Cause her man is fed up with her BS.

See, Carol's guy actually really loves her. Like, over the moon love. Adorable, right?

We don't see much true love in the Vice vault.

And while Carol says she totally hearts her dude right back, she can't seem to stop her very flirtatious ways. Ya know, like when she brings her guy to swanky T-town shindigs and spends the whole night letting strangers paw at her very enviable assets. All while her poor schmuck of a partner watches on.

Well enough is enough, and Carol Anne's man pulled her aside at a recent party for what he thought was a private conversation.

Unfortch, Carol got all dramatic (per usual) and made a scene. Now everyone's watching to see if the formerly so-happy couple busts up.

And we wouldn't be surprised if they split, like, tomorrow. It's getting that bad.