Bitch-Back! Livid About Letterman

CBS

Dear Ted:
Most everything else you have to say that's opinion I 98 percent agree with! (Go puppies! Don't touch babies!) However, I respectfully disagree completely with your assessment of Letterman! Two consensual adults, yes, doing a deceitful thing, is completely different from raping a minor (or anyone in general). I'm not saying Letterman is justified; if I were his wife he'd be missing his wiener, but this call for action against him is absurd. You say how you want public figures to step up—he did.
—BC

Dear Letterman Ticked:
Yeah, but only halfway. After Letterman's admirable owning up to the accusations, he then went on to joke about it, as if diddling the women on one's staff is just so hilarious and commonplace, chuckle-chuckle, America! Of course there's a huge difference between rape and inappropriate sex. But they both come down to the mistreatment of women, which is no laughing matter, like, get real.

Dear Ted:
I don't know if you've been following but on blog sites like Oceanup there's been a lot of talk about a Jonas/Miley Cyrus feud vs. Miley and Nick being Niley only really, really on the down-low. Any thoughts? In my opinion Miley could do better, especially if the "reconnection" was all about publicity. Though it must be hard for Nick to have an ex that is much more successful than he is.
—A

Dear Girl Power:
Trust me, there are many things these tweens want to keep hidden. It just wouldn't be good for their shiny reputations.

Dear Ted:
I recently watched Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, and Jennifer Garner looked terrible! I used to think she was so gorgeous, but now she just looks old. She's only 37, but she looks like she's well in her 40s. What happened?
—lalala

Dear Wrinkles Talk:
Marital troubles take a toll on the looks first.

Dear Ted:
I love you to pieces, you know that, but do you think that perhaps the Awful Truth may be contributing towards some of the mayhem in Robsten's life right now? We fans are all so desperate for any tidbit of information (which you so graciously give us), which in turn feeds the media frenzy to hound, spy, harass or do whatever it takes to get this information. Perhaps you could give K.S./R.P. a break by declaring one day a week a "Robsten-free" day and not allow any Robsten reference in any posts, B.B.s, Blind Vices, etc. Maybe we fans can be "weaned" from the Robsten tree of information. Just an idea.
–Annie

Dear Have It Both Ways:
Can I think about it? Promise I will.

Dear Ted:
You're kidding, right? Equating David Letterman—even casually—with Roman Polanski. Sheesh! Letterman had consensual sex with another adult, and unless we learn that these women felt coerced in some way, then it's a nonstory and none of our business. Who knows whether he and his wife have some sort of open relationship or arrangement, and would you feign this sort of outrage if this was...say...Elton John "cheating" on David Furnish?
—C

Dear Ticked Off:
With multiple members of his staff, whom he pays to be there? Yes. Let's see, what's in that job description anyway, do you think? "Blow jobs every Thursday, right after staff conference"? And what kind of example's set for the women who aren't chosen for sex by Letterman? Ever heard of something called preferential treatment? It's objectification and power abuse any way you cut it.

Dear Ted:
First, gotta say I love the Awful Team! Second, gotta ask: Did Kristen cast a spell on Rob or something? I was watching some old interviews (from the time they were allowed to say anything they wanted) and noticed how Rob used to talk about Kristen, how inspiring she was, how she made him excited about doing this movie, and now, after the rumor that they were fighting, he apologizes like crazy to her! Is he really that desperately in love with her? (Hope so!) Thanks!
—Talita

Dear Love Talks:
Rob is hardly K's little whipped puppy dog...but yeah, he's very into that girl.

Dear Ted:
Just a comment...While I will never be a fan of Twitter and stopped watching the summer repeats of Fringe when Twitter comments were included, I am delighted that Elizabeth Taylor seems to be back in the spotlight she deserves thanks to her willingness to participate. Personally, I am very happy to use all the prayers that I have toward a successful surgery and an easy recovery for La Liz. The world will be a more desolate place when she finally leaves to join Roddy McDowall and Montgomery Clift in the afterlife. Oh, to be a fly on the wall of that reunion and catch-up session. And you think you know good gossip!
—Bicho

Dear Oldie but Goodie:
I'm just pissed she says she'll never write a book. Why do all the wrong people have to have morals?

Dear Ted:
I'm a huge Robert Pattinson fan but I'm really not impressed with Kristen Stewart. She comes off as bitchy and rude. I understand that she deals with the crazy fan base, but the constant eye rolls during Comic-Con interviews were ridiculous. Doesn't she get paid to do her job? She acts like her life sucks. Which by the way doesn't. Isn't Rob her boyfriend? I just hope she gets over herself soon. Do you think Rob and her will last?
—Kelsy

Dear Public Manners:
Yes, Kristen isn't exactly the most eloquent when it comes to press time. Except I would take her angsty honest self anytime over the fake ones like Jennifer Garner and Reese Witherspoon. Not everything is always great!

Dear Ted:
I've looked around the Net, and I'm amazed that some people still refuse to believe that Judas Jack-Off and Dashed Dingle Dream are...well, you-know-who. I'm not a Blind Vice expert, but this one is as easy as Toothy Tile, right? I know that some people are in serious denial about their crush being gay, but that's really getting ridiculous! Your hints were more like anvils. What more do they need? Even if you posted a big picture of them, they still wouldn't believe it. Sad.
—Captain

Dear Oh Wise One:
Please, enlighten me...who are they?

Dear Ted:
Thank you for responding to that bitch about Shiloh's clothes. Shiloh is a kid, not a product. Kids can dress however they f--king want to dress. I don't see the problem. Whatever!
—C

Dear Clothes for Thought:
We're down with tomboys at the A.T.!

Dear Ted:
I don't really have a question; I just wanted to let you know that I found you back in April due to my Robsten obsession and became hooked reading your stuff and all the commenters' posts. After reading a wonderful blog someone wrote about you tonight, it got me thinking about all the great friends I have made while chatting in the comment section. You have brought so many people from all over the world together because of one common goal, and some of us have become lifelong cyber friends because of it.
—G C11

Dear Faniston:
Anytime, pals.

Dear Ted:
I know that you work for E! which is also the same network behind The Girls Next Door, so I don't know how much you're allowed to reveal, but I don't think it's any secret that Hef's relationship with his latest bunch of so-called "girlfriends" is more contractual than sexual. But do you think he and Holly Madison were really in love with each other at some point?
—Spring chicken

Dear Age Gaps:
I think trying to understand certain people's love or attraction to one another isn't always in my job description—let's leave that to the poor therapists of Hollywood. But sure, I think he and Holly had something "special." Actually liked them together.

Dear Ted:
So I've been intrigued by Leonardo DiCaprio since I was in fourth grade. Something about him is so interesting. Can you tell me some of the inside scoop on him? Like if he's been a recent B.V. or if he has any skeletons in the closet. Pretty please with a cherry on top.
—Mobey

Dear Sink or Swim:
Recent? No. Leo is pretty out there with his lady-lovin' self!

Dear Ted:
Nothing makes me happier than putting my adorable preschooler to bed, getting the biggest glass of wine I can find and sitting down to read every single word you write! Thank you.
—Havins

Dear Red or White:
Glad I can be your nightcap. You sober for those midnight cries, doll?

Dear Ted:
I'm sure the person that started this blog already emailed you the link—but read the comments, we all agree. You catch a lot of hate from the "non-stens" out there (jealousy) but I think you should change the name of your column to "Gossip with Heart," because while you do stir the pot to keep things interesting you clearly are a sweetie.
—Jersey

Dear "Heart" Attack:
Hallmark I so am not. Thanks, though!

Dear Ted:
Why do celebrities who once talked about their relationships (e.g., K.Stew and Mike Angarano) now give the "I don't talk about my private life" bull-sugar-honey-ice-tea response? Is it that their new guy is hotter (which would make most scream it from the rooftops), production company stronghold, or is it what they think is maturity? There are moments when they speak of their current relationship and it seems as soon as its printed, they're on to the next one (Jessica Simpson, J.Lo, etc.), but regardless, what does your genius mind think is the true reason?
—M

Dear Time and Again:
I feel like I've said my piece about this—but you seem nice so I'll do it again. Too much is at stake (financially) when you get involved with a costar and the public finds out. Nothing in Hollywood is forever, which studio suits who have been around know, so they don't want their moneymakers confirming a romance that (they think) will likely bust up. Plus, then K.Stew is the "tramp" who cheated and Rob's the "asshole" who stole her away. Isn't that how our patronizing society works?