Stars Think Pink at a New L.A. Eatery

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RSVPs:  Jessica Alba, Kevin Connolly, Kristin Cavallari…
When:  June 28
Where:  Pink Taco

The entire second level of the Westfield Century City mall is illuminated in hot pink. I’m handed a pink wristband, there’s a pink carpet and a pink donkey. No, it’s not Paris Hilton’s welcome-home party—it’s the Opening of Pink Taco. This is the latest outlet of Harry Morton’s restaurant chain, which debuted in his dad Peter’s Las Vegas Hard Rock Hotel and since then has branched out to Scottsdale’s Hotel Valley Ho and now La-La Land.

Playing the Name Game
It seems a little strange that Harry would open his third restaurant in a shopping mall. I personally would’ve picked a trendier spot. I try to ask Lindsay Lohan’s ex about his decision, but the man of the hour is doing no interviews. He probably just doesn’t want to explain the meaning of the eatery’s moniker. Is it really based off a menu item like he’s claimed? Or does it have a more sexual connotation? With “Eating out never tasted so good” as its tagline, I’ll let you be the judge.

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Ron Jeremy, however, is more than happy to discuss. “It’s very suggestive,” says the famed porn star, who often frequents the Sin City location. “I go with Dennis Hof and the Bunny Ranch Girls. They love the title.” I bet they do.

Collegiate Carousal
The space makes me feel like I’m on spring break. Inside, a large bar sprawls across a dance floor, where Amy Smart boogies in her pink open-toed pumps. Dark booths encircle the area, providing privacy for Kristin Cavallari and Nick Zano to get their canoodle on. Outside, models—and skinny starlets like Mary-Kate Olsen—chain-smoke while college-looking boys take Trago tequila shots under thatched canopies. Mariachi band members snap photos with guests while midgets dressed in sombreros teeter around. With all this commotion, I need a drink. I walk past E!'s own funnygal Chelsea Handler and head to the Red Bull bar on the patio and try to decide whether to order a Sex Taco, Horny Bull or Bom Chicka Wah Wah. What’s next? A wet T-shirt contest?

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Child Stars Gone Wild
It’s only 9 p.m., and Pink Taco is already so crowded you can barely move. “Excuse me, poor person coming through!” a busboy yells as he tries to make his way to the service station. I move over and bump right into Jodie Sweetin’s ginormous breasts. Stephanie Tanner has grown a very full house.

After squeezing past Marlon Wayans and director Brett Ratner, I’m able to pull aside one of my favorite Entourage boys, Rex Lee. “The name is so fun,” he tells me of Pink Taco. “It’s whimsical!” That’s one way of putting it. 

I suggest that Vinny and his pack would love this place, and Rex immediately concurs, pointing across the table to Kevin Connolly. Both of them are going to start using their summer hiatus from their HBO hit series to delve into film. “I don’t have enough money to take time off,” Kevin jests. “Rich people take time off.” I wonder if that’s a low blow directed toward his ex, Nicky Hilton? But Kevin seems to be doing just fine in the girl department. He’s surrounded by a trio of tall, smiling beauties who seem more than entertained. You go, E.

Trouble in Paradise
Not so happy is Jessica Alba. She arrived separately from Cash Warren, but they are now engaged in what looks to be an argument. As I try to catch the gist of their lovers' quarrel, Cash walks off and starts talking to big-breasted porn star Mary Carey. Don’t worry, Jess—I know about a million guys who would be happy to take Cash’s place if it doesn’t work out.

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Another Night of Sardines
I run into an obstacle as I try to make my way inside for Men Without Sex’s performance: It’s Tom Arnold. I’m scared of sliding past him in fear of getting drenched by the torrents of sweat pouring off his body. Thankfully, he veers off to get another bottle of water, and I’m free to chat with Rod Stewart’s clan at a back inside table. Kimberly Stewart is looking utterly fabulous in a black cutout dress, but Sean is the one getting all the attention. “You are the sexiest man alive, Sean,” a pretty blonde says to Kim’s brother, who tells me I can hear his new song in the upcoming Bratz: The Movie. I picture him dating doll-looking girls more than singing about dollies, but I’ll wait to judge till I hear the soundtrack.

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Just as Rod’s other offspring, Ruby, starts telling me about the crazy paparazzi at her dad’s recent wedding (they dug holes in the dirt to try to get inside!) an alarm goes off. It’s 11 p.m. and the party’s over. Mr. Fire Marshal is back from Mr. Chow, and this time, he’s shutting the event down. It’s time for the pink donkey to take a bath...and for Pink Taco to rest up for its next night of debauchery.

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