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Rihanna: "Ruin My Song, Please!"
Lisa O?Connor/ZUMAPress.com, Lester Cohen/WireImage.com
Just like anyone else with a pulse, we're obsessed with Rihanna's steamy summer hit "Umbrella."
If only every other producer in town were not. Then we could avoid the murderous remixes coming out, namely one featuring young Chris Brown.
Usually fun with fancy footwork, Brown falls face-first on this duet. The second verse and half the choruses have been rewritten to accommodate him, essentially turning our precious track into the lyrical equivalent of an awkward high school dance.
Brown's vocals are so flat and whiny it sounds as if he has Rihanna's umbrella lodged somewhere unfortunate.
DJs everywhere—run back to the original. Please?!
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