The Mustache Man Belts Bachelorette Blues

Of the many contrived, manufactured moments on man-hopping Bachelorette Jillian Harris's exhibitionistic quest for televised love, this was not one of them.

Yet somehow, it's that much more excruciating.

On the other hand, there's something about a middle-aged white man with a giant mustache singing the blues that could bring generations of dead bluesmen back from the grave, as some kind of rabid zombie army primed to annihilate The Bachelorette and everything she stands for. Now that would make for great television. 

Plus, it'd be as real as everything else on the show.