Looking For New Obsessions? Try a Super Virus, Cat Hat, Clooney or the Apocalypse!

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Isn't it time for another one of your obsession lists? What's coming out in the fall that I need to care about?
—Fr. Shane, via Facebook

Indeed it is. There are plenty of events coming this fall that you'll definitely enjoy. For one, Eddie Murphy is doing a new movie, and he isn't a fat suit. That's major. Really.

What else? Well, let's get started with a new list of things worth obsessing about:

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1. George Clooney, aka The King of Fall: Moviewise, Clooney tends to hibernate in the summer and re-emerge in the autumn, resplendent in his Italian menswear, ready to usher in the latest Oscar season and the important movies therein. And 2011 is no exception. In fact, this fall, Clooney will have two movies. In October we'll get the political drama The Ides of March, followed by the Alexander Payne comedy The Descendants in November. Does that pretty much mean that Clooney will be everywhere this fall? Yes, yes it does. And that's just fine by me.

2. Eddie Murphy Loses the Fat Suit: The import of this cannot be overstated. Yes, technically, we're talking about Murphy doing some sort of movie. It doesn't matter what the movie is. What matters is that there is no fat suit. May the hosannas ring all the way to Tyler Perry's trailer.

3. Bazillion-Dollar Hats That Make You Look Like a Cat.

4. That Scary New Show by the Creator of Glee: It's one of the most highly anticipated TV shows of the coming season, and not just because it co-stars Denis "Russell Edgington" O'Hare from True Blood. It's also supposed to be super scary, super atmospheric and super styish.

5. Camelot. Look, we have no Game of Thrones coming this fall. The Tudors was aging and running to fat before it even ended. The Hobbit movies don't arrive in the Realm of Men until next year. That leaves us with Camelot, a TV show about Merlin, costarring Joseph Fiennes. It hasn't been picked up for a second season, and it's running on Starz starting next month. Look, if I had any Game of Thrones news, believe me, I'd lead with that.

6. Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim: It's no Mass Effect III (which does not come out until next year). It's also not Dragon Age III, which, depending on who you talk to, may be a good thing or a bad thing. But if you need an RPG, Elder Scrolls V is what you get this fall. One major comfort: You get to fight dragons and suck in their souls. Not bad, for a game that is not Dragon Age III.

7. That Girl From The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo: Not That Girl. The Other Girl. I can't really include the American remake of Girl on this list, as it doesn't debut until December. December is not fall. But people desperate for that Dragon Tattoo fix will be able to get it sooner, albeit a degree or two removed. I, as well as other nerds, are excited to see the original Girl, Noomi Rapace, in the next Sherlock Holmes flick, starring Robert Downey Jr. Wait, the Sherlock Holmes flick happens in December too? Dammit it all to hell! Let's obsess about both girls then. OK, scratch that. How about...

8. Contagion! Matt Damon, Kate Winslet, Laurence Fishburne--every big star ever born is in this movie, which details the spread of a mystery virus that mutates faster than Lady Gaga. Bonuses: Steven Soderbergh is directing, and Gwyneth Paltrow is a victim, and dies. It breaks out Sept. 9.

9. The rapture, again: That's right. It didn't happen in May, but it is, seriously, for keeps this time, happening this fall. The really real date for world annihilation is Oct. 21, according to Harold Camping. Yes, that's the same California preacher who gave us the May date for the end of the world, but let's thank him, not put him down. All those canned goods and bottled water we stashed away in the spring are still totally good through winter.

10. What are you excited about?

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