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Halle Cops to Suicide Attempt

Thu., Mar. 29, 2007 7:25 AM PDT by Gina Serpe

Halle Berry may be the image of independence and confidence today, but, of her own admission, that wasn't always the case.

The Oscar-winning actor has confessed to Parade magazine that she tried to commit suicide shortly after the demise of her first marriage, to Atlanta Braves ball player David Justice.

Berry, 40, told the weekly magazine that she attempted to gas herself in her car but pulled out after realizing how "selfish" the act would be.

"I was sitting in my car, and I knew the gas was coming when I had an image of my mother finding me," she said. "She sacrificed so much for her children, and to end my life would be an incredibly selfish thing to do."

As for where the urge to end it came from, Berry blames the toll her failed marriage took on her emotions.

"It was all about a relationship. My sense of worth was so low," she said. "I had to reprogram myself to see the good in me. Because someone didn't love me didn't mean I was unlovable. I promised myself I would never be a coward again."

Berry's marriage to Justice ended acrimoniously in 1996 after slightly more than three years together and amid accusations of physical abuse. Berry filed a restraining order against Justice during the divorce proceedings, claiming she feared for her "personal safety and well-being."

In an interview with Ebony in 1997, Berry alluded to a suicide attempt, telling the magazine she sat in her car for "two or three hours, I just cried and cried. I thought 'I can't face it.'"

Things went better, though not much, with her second marriage to confessed sex addict Eric Benet.

The twosome married in 2001 and divorced four years later in the wake of Benet's widely publicized confession.

Berry described the marriage as "really horrific" and told Parade she wishes she'd gotten out of the ill-fated relationship a lot sooner.

"We were in sex rehab after one year. I wish I had left then, but I was putting everyone's needs before mine. If I hadn't gone through the first breakup and made that promise to myself, this would have leveled me. I would have walked into moving traffic."

As for her current love life, things couldn't be going better. Berry has been quietly dating 31-year-old model Gabriel Aubry since the twosome met at a Versace photoshoot in November 2005.

"Fame is hard on relationships," she said "If two of you are in the fishbowl, forget it. If one is, it's tough on a relationship. Men can sometimes feel a bit diminished. It's nothing you do but how you're perceived."

And despite a recent vow to never marry again, Berry says that she's more than ready to become a first time mother.

"I've accomplished things I never thought I would. Now my sights are set on a different chapter in my life, which is motherhood. That's the goal I have very clearly set for myself."