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condensed soup (50 posts)
Sean Young & Michael Lohan Smackdown: Now That's Rehab!
Tensions are running high in the Celebrity Rehab camp as Father of the Decade Michael Lohan's chronically vocalized obsession with Michael Lohan actually wakes Sean Young from her sound, booze-free slumber. And apparently she didn't get her coffee before the screaming began.
The thing to remember is, this is what these people are like sober.
And to see what Joel McHale is like sober, pretty much, come back tonight when a new Soup beams your way at 10 p.m. ET/PT!
Hungry for more? Keep reading ...
Condensed Soup: Mike Tyson Tucks You in on Same Name
What if famous people traded places with lowly mortals who happen to have the same name?
Cleverly titled Same Name answers that question with the help of lovable convicted rapist Mike Tyson, who takes on the roll of daddy to a middle American family. But come bedtime, will he put the kids to sleep with a sweet fairy tale? Or knock'em out with the legend of the ear-biting monster?
Joel McHale reveals all, and then gets back in the ring for another round as a spanking new Soup comes your way at 10 p.m. ET/PT!
Condensed Soup: It Hurts to Swallow on America's Got Talent
America has plenty of talent—just look at those Kardashians—but you'd never know it from watching America's Got Talent.
Unless you consider bruising your esophagus talent. From the inside. With a sword.
Okay, that is kind of a talent. Especially compared to the Kardashians...
Condensed Soup: The Bachelorette Bails on Another One
ABC/CRAIG SJODIN
The Bachelorette's Ashley Hebert has so much quality manhood to choose from she's able to cast off even a lovable, mannequin-esque hunk of potential husband.
Of course, we're talking about Ames, who manages to combine confused, heartbroken and devastated into an empty perma-grin as he leaves the show with a handful of flop sweat instead of a rose.
It's a moment so wrenching it takes the sensitive touch of tender Joel McHale to put it all into perspective...
Condensed Soup: Blonde Ambition on Toddlers & Tiaras
TLC
Back in the old days, in a certain country that wanted to rule the world, being blonde-haired and blue-eyed was a positive boon. Now, in a certain country that wants to rule the world, apparently that combo is not so hot. At least in the world of toddler beauty pageants.
Let Joel McHale sort it all out for you...
Condensed Soup: Tatum O'Neal Can't Be Curbed!
Thank God those unpredictable O'Neals' self-respect is about as healthy as their acting careers; on Ryan & Tatum: the O'Neals, the pair trot out all the thrilling train wreckage of their wretched lives for your enjoyment, thanks to Oprah and her educational OWN network. It's a bit heartbreaking, sure, but why not let Joel McHale make the pain all funny for you?
He will this very night at 10 p.m. ET/PT on a new Soup.
Condensed Soup: Joel McHale, Tartar Sauce and Freaky Eaters—It's Just That Sexy!
Who knew the seemingly innocuous forces of mayonnaise, lemon juice and pickle relish could join forces to destroy a woman's life? Everyone who watched Freaky Eaters this week.
And yes, she puts it on cupcakes.
Come back for seconds tonight when a fresh Soup enters your life at 10 p.m. ET/PT!
Hankerin' for a little somethin' somethin' right now? Check out this tuber maniac...
Condensed Soup: Small Boobs Stoke Big Roast on The Bachelorette
When a man wants to impress the woman he wants to marry, it's only natural that he gleefully mocks her breast size on national TV, right? Apparently it is when that man is bachelor William and he's roasting Bachelorette Ashley Hebert, who took the ribbing like a champ. And then broke down, weeping into her A cups in the wings.
Don't worry, Joel McHale will make it all seem funny, plus he's stacked! Check him out tonight at 10 p.m. ET/PT when a new Soup comes your way!
But if you can't hold out until then, there's more laughs after the jump...
Condensed Soup: America's Got Talent, but for What, Exactly?
In case you're still skeptical after five seasons, two Brits and a germaphobe are back to prove that America does indeed have talent. But how can we be expected to concentrate on the staggering displays of nationalistic artistry when Nick Cannon can't keep his hands off of himself? And is that actually a talent?
This and many other questions will be answered tonight at 10 p.m. ET/PT when Joel McHale dishes up a fresh batch of Soup.
Condensed Soup: American Idol's Big Head, Plus Kim Kardashian's Big Wed
As American Idol proved this week, America loves country warbler Scotty McCreery. The America that also loves dining at Circle K and chrome bull testicles dangling from the bumper of their Dodge Ram Hemi. And that's our America, by the way. Now you can join Joel McHale in watching Scott's head move!
Speaking of love, check out Wendy Williams' blistering impression of Kim K.'s big proposal moment.
Then come back for more on your fresh Soup tonight at 10 p.m. ET/PT!
Want more McHale right now? Read on ...
