condensed soup (50 posts)

There's no denying the sadness within the Kardashian family at the moment, but luckily plucky Joel McHale is able to bring a moment of happiness to this tragic situation. Meaning Bruce Jenner's still fair game.

As is so much else, as you'll see tonight when a new Soup comes your way at 10 p.m. ET/PT!

MORE: Engaged Woman Fears Face Full of Junk on Bachelorette Party: Las Vegas

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After all those dull, serious news reports on the first three hours of the Today show, it's always a treat to watch Kathie Lee and Hoda Kotb get liquored up and humiliate each other.

In this case, Kathie Lee touches on Hoda's chronic, man-free existance. And by "touches on" we mean carves her up like so much raw chuck. Good times!

There's more to be had when a new Soup comes your way tonight at 10 p.m. ET/PT.

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Just when you thought the high watermark of public gross behavior was completely and utterly owned by lovable Jersey Shore hussies Snooki and Deena, along comes a young lady with the skill, determination and intoxication levels to shame the seasoned pros, but good.

And all it takes is some loud music, Deena's clutch, and an unnamable sex act that's probably illegal in certain states. And icky in all of them.

Your humble Soup mesiter Joel McHale has this and even more devilment in store for you tonight at 10 p.m. ET/PT. Be there!

PHOTOS: The Soup Guest Apperances

In most of the country, informed, television-watching Americans like to start their day with a savvy update on the pertinent issues that affect us all: the economy, the war in the middle east, the turbulent political spectrum.

In Los Angeles, however, an informed morning begins with empty nattering about shoes and the weather. Plus awkward dancing! Luckily, Good Day LA nails all this and more, and now Joel McHale serves it up for the rest of our nation to enjoy...

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Apparently, someone in marketing decided that 1987's Fatal Attraction's 25th anniversary was somehow significant.

And, despite the fact that the anniversary is actually next year, the cast has reunited to celebrate the cinematic glory of philandering, attempted murder and animal abuse. Ah, they just don't make 'em like that anymore, and luckily Entertainment Tonight is here to bring you all the F.A. news you crave.

And Joel McHale is all over that, among many other things, as he spreads his chuckle bait especially for you. Follow that trail of laughter back to your TV set at 10 p.m. ET/PT for a fresh Soup!

HUNGRY FOR MORE? Check out Joel McHale, male model.

When someone has devoted their entire public life to humiliating themselves in a smorgasbord of base ways, you'd think they would have developed a Teflon ego.

That someone being Jersey Shore's Snooki. But wait...after a particularly wretched night on the town, the proud, porky guidette actually has a moment of clarity, and realizes she does, indeed, look like s--t...

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Close your eyes.

Imagine a world where people eat tartar sauce on cupcakes, adult women love to stroll around wearing full diapers, and David Hasselhoff is your doctor.

Then imagine Joel McHale extending his lightly calloused hand to guide you on a personal tour of this delightful freak show.

Now open your eyes. Quickly read the above. Now that you've caught up, you're a mere computer click away from it all coming true!

And don't forget to come back for more stimulation when a new Soup beams your way at 10 p.m. ET/PT!

MORE: Check out the Many Moods of David Hasselhoff gallery

Remember the old days when boxing champs would hold up buffalo nickels to their ears and pretend they were talking into big black bakelite telephones?

Welcome to the modern world, where sluggers of today Floyd Mayweather and Victor Ortiz use stacks of crisp greenbacks for their make-believe cell phone fun. This represents just a few of the exciting moments in HBO's 24/7 Mayweather/Ortiz. Then they start hitting each other and it's all downhill

Join comedy knockout Joel McHale tonight as he weighs in with another round of Soup at 10 p.m. ET/PT! With no more boxing metaphors.

MORE: Joel McHale, Male Model

Jersey Shore's Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino may be a self-obsessed, babe-bangin' seaside tool, but that doesn't mean he's not sensitive.

In fact, his current sitch involves running headfirst into an immovable surface (a wall, not JWoww's chest) and sustaining injuries that have left him recuperating all alone in the house. Apart from the camera crew. Anyway, he's sad...

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Just when life seemed so perfect for sexy Kim Kardashian—a wildly popular reality show, the dream wedding, the Mensa-level intellectual power—it all comes crumbling down like a house of cards.

Yes, she lost her diamond earring. In the ocean. And while many people might remove jewelry worth tens of thousands of dollars before dipping in, not Kim.

Imagine the audacity of that ocean! Does it not know who this woman is?

Joel McHale does, and he'll get to the bottom of the story tonight at 10 p.m. ET/PT when your weekly Soup comes your way.