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Brit: To the Mattresses!

Britney Spears, Kevin Federline Kevin Mazur/WireImage.com, Chris Weeks/WireImage.com

Sure, we know you never thought you'd think it, but K-Fed seems like a sober, responsible parent who avoids pimpin' out his kids to the paparazzi...but Brit's still hoping to dig up some dirt.

This according to Us Weekly and TMZ, who claim the pop tart has hired a private investigator to prove she's not the only screwup in this dysfunctional divorce. 

Only, Federline's legal eagle, Mark Vincent Kaplan, says following the ex Mr. Spears around is a waste of time and money. 

"I don't think he would be concerned about it, and I don't think he has to change anything he is doing in order to address that," Kaplan, tells usmagazine.com. 

Yup, too bad you got scooped, Brit. Now, Kevin can dump the bodies and get back to being daddy dearest without skipping a beat.

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