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Can Lindsay Lohan Ever Make a Career Comeback?
How can Lindsay Lohan get her career back, or is her career beyond repair?
—April, California
You mean LiLo's brand-new, completely uncalculated bid at self-deprecation (above) didn't instantly win over your heart and mind?
How jaded and unspringlike you are for a girl named April.
A few publicists tell me that made-for-cable movie star Lindsay Lohan probably scored some PR points by making fun of herself on Funny or Die. But even more flacks—in fact, the majority of them—say the opposite. They say there's only one thing Lohan should do right now if she wants to get a life again, and that is...
Shut up! She must shut up! Shut up about the hell of losing SamRo and the Hades of being exploited by the press and the trauma of the Industry not taking her seriously.
"The first thing Lindsay Lohan should do is stop talking about how desperate she is for work," says Gene Grabowski, Senior Vice President of Levick Strategic Communications, which has worked with Rosie O'Donnell. "She must look, act and sound like a winner, not a loser."
If Linds does go out, she must brush her hair and sit still while people photograph her—on a red carpet or a daytime-TV talk show, not on a sidewalk outside of a club.
"She has to appear at a worthwhile fund-raiser or do some morning news shows, where she is dressed conservatively, acting polished and centered," crisis PR expert Cherie Kerr tells me. "All in all, she has to demonstrate that she is turning her life around."
But LiLo stands a much better chance if she simply stays in and orders Domino's.
"Long term, she should disappear for a few weeks, just get out the media glare and get out of L.A.," celebrity public speaking consultant Matt Eventoff tells me.
And what to do after that? Well, selflessness always helps. After all, just when Angelina Jolie was starting to look a tad too skanky for the A-list, she offered herself up to the U.N. and adopted a Cambodian child. It worked.
"Lindsay needs to literally disappear," publicist Tyler Barnett says. But after that, he "would advise LiLo to get involved with a charity. If she can commit herself to a cause she feels strongly about, it will not only boost her public image, but [also her] self-esteem."
Lastly, once LiLo finds that charity, she should not take her blog to discuss it. Enough with the blog, Lindsay. Seriously.
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