Biel confirmed to Colbert that she and her husband Justin Timberlake are in the middle of their son's terrible twos. She talked about the things she has to "pry out of his little slimy hand," like tiny toy figures, to avoid having him choke or poke himself in the middle of the night. Because if there's one thing this mom doesn't want, it's for her son to be woken up at night.
"God forbid they wake up in the middle of the night," Biel told the host. "You know, if you wake my kid up in the middle of the night by accident, you're dead to me."
Colbert joked that it was likely her singer spouse and his friends who were causing any late-night noise.
"That's right," Biel jested. "Not my friends. My friends are quiet, demure, modest. He's a wild musician."
However, the actress had nice things to say about her little one, too.
"I mean, listen: It's not all terrible, by the way," she told Colbert. "He's like the greatest of all time. Now, I'm feeling really bad. He's cute. He's funny."
But if Biel and Timberlake are struggling now, just wait until next year when their son turns three.
"For me, this is terrible, but I've heard so much about the ‘three-teens,'" Biel said. "The three-year-olds are called the ‘three-teens' because they're so insane that they're just like having tiny teenagers, which is way worse than having big teenagers, I think."
Thankfully, Biel and her husband have a place where all parents can go to get a little relief. Biel co-owns a restaurant called Au Fudge in Los Angeles, a name she said was inspired by the fact that parents "don't get to say the fun words anymore" once they have kids. At the restaurant, parents can order food or drinks while the kids enjoy the restaurant's "creative space" and spend time with the establishment's au pair.
Silas' birth was announced in April 2015, and the "SexyBack" singer confirmed that his wife was pregnant in January of that year.
"[It's] easier in the sense that I truly understand what it means to have a child, what the history of that looks like," she said at the show's premiere event in New York. "You know, the actual process of it. And then what it means to be a parent. So, playing a person who commits a crime like this and then has to really deal with the repercussions of how does that look like for her family unit—that I really understand and I feel very connected to that idea."
The show, which Biel also produced, is on USA Network.