Review in a Hurry: It's The Karate Kid meets, well, countless martial-arts epics, as a present-day American kid travels back to ancient China for kung-fu training with two Mr. Miyagis (Jet Li and Jackie Chan). This mishmash of other, better films boasts thrilling fight sequences, but the bland story and characters aren't worthy of its international superstars.
The Bigger Picture: Devoted fans, who can wax on (and wax off) about the total kick-assery of Jet Li and Jackie Chan, have eagerly awaited this cinematic event, the first-ever onscreen pairing of the martial-arts titans. There's plenty in this kid-targeted pic to dazzle young grasshoppers, but those hoping for edgier, more engaging fare will be disappointed.
One problem is the boring protagonist, Jason (Michael Angarano), a Boston teenager obsessed with classic Hong Kong flicks and...well, that's about the extent of his character. When thugs try to rob an elderly Chinese pawnbroker (Chan), Jason steps in and grabs the old guy's staff, which magically dumps him into feudal China.
To get back to the future, Jason must take the staff to the fabled Monkey King (Li), who has been imprisoned by the powerful Jade Warlord (Collin Chou, sporting sassy blue eye shadow). During his journey to the Jade dude's palace, Jason learns the art of kung fu from two mismatched teachers—drunken Lu Yan (Chan again, in a bad wig) and Silent Monk (Li again). He also finds budding romance with the pretty but vague Golden Sparrow (Liu Yifei).
Kingdom clips along and delivers on the action, especially in the climactic showdown, with slick CGI effects and awesome acrobatics choreographed by Woo-Ping Yuen, famous for The Matrix and Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.
Otherwise, there's not much to get psyched about. The characters are dull, the acting is stiff, the dialogue is clumsy and anachronistic and the film's idea of humor is Li peeing on Chan's face while he tries to summon rain. Yuck. Kingdom pisses away its chance to be more than middling entertainment.
The 180—a Second Opinion: Exterior scenes are shot in gorgeous locations around China, including deserts, rivers, waterfalls, lush mountains and bamboo forests. You'll want to book that Asia vacay right away!