Why Janet Jackson's Marriage to Wissam al Mana May Have Never Been Meant to Last: Family, Privacy & an Insurmountable Culture Clash

Super-private yet high-profile couple split up three months after their son was born as existing problems became insurmountable once they became parents

By Natalie Finn Apr 10, 2017 8:33 PMTags

Barely three months after welcoming their son, Janet Jackson and Wissam Al Mana have separated.

The news landed with a thud, a shocking turn of events during what should have been the happiest time of Jackson's life. The 50-year-old pop icon had wanted to have a child for years; while she didn't have the easiest pregnancy, the birth of her son Eissa in January was said to have been "stress-free" and healthy.

A source told E! News that Jackson was "in her element" as a mom, adding, "This is what she has been waiting her whole life for."

But by the time she became a mother, she no longer had designs on an ideal nuclear family life with Al Mana by her side. 

It's impossible to pinpoint the moment when Jackson's marriage broke down so soon after such a joyful development, but in all likelihood the cracks started to appear long before Eissa—which translates to "Jesus" in Arabic—arrived.

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Janet Jackson and Wissam Al Mana: Romance Rewind

Not long after she and producer Jermaine Dupri broke up after seven years of dating, the twice-divorced Jackson was asked in 2009 if she still believed in marriage. "For [some] people, sure," she told Harper's Bazaar in her first interview since Michael Jackson's death on June 25, 2009. "I don't know if I'll get married again. I'll put it like this: If God wants me to, then I will."

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"I haven't entertained any offers [for dates] thus far," she added, "but I'm locking myself in my work right now."

Instead, the Grammy winner met Al Mana at a hotel opening in Dubai in April 2010. The Qatari-born, London-bred billionaire businessman co-owns the Al Mana Group, which operates a number of high-end automakers and fashion retailers in the Persian Gulf region, with his two brothers—a dynamic that Jackson, as a member of one of the most famous families in entertainment history, could certainly understand.

They hit it off and started dating a few months later. That September they were spotted together at a party thrown by Roberto Cavalli in Paris. But though future public sightings would be few and far between for the couple, as they spent most of their time together outside of the United States, they weren't keeping their relationship a secret.

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Janet Jackson and Wissam Al Mana Split: A Timeline of Their Relationship

"I think a man's dream woman changes as he goes through different stages in his life. I'm fortunate to be dating my dream woman now," Al Mana told Harper's Bazaar Arabia in 2011.

The following year, amid rumors that they had a big wedding planned, he and Jackson took off and tied the knot without anyone outside of their inner circle being the wiser until Jackson confirmed she was a married woman in February 2013.

Having seen the effect that relentless media coverage had on her brother Michael Jackson, as well as the spotlight's effect on her and most of her sprawling family, it's no wonder that Janet was determined to live the offstage portion of her life as privately as possible—especially after Michael died.

And she had certainly met her match in Al Mana, whose high-stakes business dealings, wealth and close family ties had made him an intensely private, albeit public, person as well. 

"I'm grateful for success. Success is wonderful," Janet wrote in her 2011 book True You. "The truth, though, is that being in the spotlight can complicate personal problems even more. You never have a chance to deal with yourself privately and work through issues on your own. Everything is on display for the world to see."

For his part, Al Mani told Entrepreneur Middle East in 2014, "You can ask me anything you want; I'm very opinionated... except about my private life. I don't want to talk about that."

However, no matter how love-hate her relationship with the spotlight was, Janet was still an entertainer. Said to be worth roughly $150 million, her lucrative brand, unlike her husband's, is built around her—and to remain fresh, the fans have to be fed every once in awhile (although having had a 40-year career, she could conceivably call it quits now and retire secure in the knowledge that she's a legend who'll never be forgotten).

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The Intensely Private World of Janet Jackson: Why She Traded Fame for a Quiet Family Life

The bloom was rumored to be off the rose as early as 2014, but any reports of trouble in paradise were soon overshadowed by the rapturous news that Jackson was planning to head back out on tour.

"This year, new music, new world tour, a new movement," Jackson announced in a video message marking her 49th birthday in May 2015. "I've been listening. Let's keep the conversation going." She also made a grand return to the BET Awards that June, to accept the Dance Icon Award; she thanked her husband, but he didn't make the trip to be there in person.

Her Unbreakable World Tour kicked off on Aug. 31, 2015, and her fans were overjoyed. Many also ended up disappointed, however, as issues with her throat caused a number of cancellations and then, in April 2016, she pulled the plug on her tour entirely because she and her husband were—as she cryptically put it at the time—"planning our family."

Happy but sad news for the Rhythm Nation. But mostly happy. Whenever asked over the years, Jackson had been honest about wanting to have children. She said in 2009 that she was open to the idea of adopting, but repeatedly she expressed faith that, if having kids was meant to be, it would be.
Swan Gallet/WWD/REX Shutterstock

The planning was prudent, because in May 2016 E! News learned that Jackson was indeed pregnant. She gave birth in London on Jan. 3.

About three weeks later, her 86-year-old mother, Katherine Jackson, flew to the U.K. to stay with Janet—presumably because she wanted to meet her grandchild, but the trip also coincided with the Jackson family matriarch obtaining a restraining order against her nephew Trent Lamar Jackson. The TRO petition alleged elder abuse and a plot to manipulate her and obtain control over her money; Trent has denied any wrongdoing. Janet's sister Rebbie Jackson, who is mentioned in the court documents as having witnessed instances of abuse, joined them in London.

Katherine flew back to Los Angeles late last month to testify (a hearing is scheduled for April 25) and has reportedly been staying with Rebbie rather than at her Calabasas property, where Trent had been living in the guest house.

TMZ is now reporting, meanwhile, that Katherine going to London may have had more to do with Janet's failing marriage than anything occurring on her home front.

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Katherine Jackson's Complicated World: How the Matriarch Has Remained the Unbreakable Center of Her Family Through Scandal & Tragedy

"I spend time with my wife. It's a luxury. We love traveling," Al Mana also told Entrepreneur in 2014. "We love going to nice, exotic places far away from the world and from prying eyes. Over time, like anything in life, you find ways to master it and you learn how to do that."

But while they outwardly led a very cosmopolitan lifestyle, replete with yachts and private jets, and Al Mana's business means he's a fixture in the luxury fashion world, according to multiple accounts he's more traditional and conservative when it pertains to family.

At least when it comes to clothes, Jackson's style did become markedly more conservative after they got together, both when she was out alone and with her husband.

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Janet Jackson's Best Looks From Red Carpet to Concerts

When she returned to the stage in 2015, one of Jackson's primary costumes was a long-sleeve tunic over harem pants. She wore the modest ensemble with her usual flair, but it made for a stark contrast to her more flamboyant, skin-baring tour looks of the past. (Though, ironically, when you think of Janet in the '80s, you think fierce military-inspired chic and her signature cap.)

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There have also been rumors for months either that Jackson, who was raised a Jehovah's Witness but had distanced herself from certain tenets of the holiday-eschewing faith, had converted to Islam for Al Mana or was planning to do so as the birth of her child approached.

Two people who aren't entirely on the same page about religion can make it work, but that gets harder when a child enters the equation. Not that parents have to be the same religion, obviously, but it can create major friction when they don't agree about how to raise their kids—and in this case, multiple reports suggest that Jackson and Al Mana's differences only became more irreconcilable once their son was born.

"The cultural differences between her and Wissam became even more obvious," a source told People in the wake of the separation news. "They come from very different worlds. "For years, Janet tried to adapt to his culture. Since it's not a culture she grew up with, it's been challenging for her. She often felt she disappointed Wissam."

One insider told the Daily Mail that Janet thought Al Mana had "become too controlling" during her pregnancy, while a source told Page Six that "Wissam showed little to no concern" about Katherine Jackson's elder abuse claims and that in turn was a deal-breaker for Janet—for at the end of the day, she remains just as devoted to her roots as Al Mana does to his.

Reps for Jackson and Al Mana have not responded to requests for comment or otherwise confirmed the validity of these observations.

Ultimately, Janet's desire to become a mother may have outweighed the importance of her personal happiness, at least in the short run. 

Which is not to say that the 42-year-old Al Mana was only in the picture to father Jackson's baby, but it could be a reason why she tried to make it work for so long. While it's no longer considered unusual to get started later in life, if she still wanted to have her own biological child, the time had come.

"They're both busy people but determined to be good parents, even if they're apart," a source told the U.K.'s Mail on Sunday. "It's amicable and Eissa will stay with his mother, who is basing herself in London."