The Housewives do everything in their own way. It might not be the best, but it's their best. They're doing their best.
This applies to pretty much all aspects of the Real Housewives lifestyle, from marriages to personal style to careers to product sponsorship. But it also couldn't be more true when it comes to the real estate empires of the Housewives. These women do their homes their own way, and if you don't understand it then you can just see yourself out.
Although, these particularities and idiosyncrasies can be quite confusing—dizzying, dare we say—for those who are not well versed in all the terms and trends frequented in the Real Housewives real estate universe. Which is exactly why we created this glossary: So that you never have to say "What's a Baja shelf?" again.
Consider this a list with a life of its own; like the homes of the Housewives, it will grow and upgrade and flip as need be. But for now, reference this glossary whenever you find yourself questioning a see-through fridge, or if you need your own design ideas. Because Lisa shouldn't be the only one enjoying the Baja shelf.
Abundance Candles: A candle that can help combat financial stress and allow its lighters the peace of mind to make good financial decisions. As Sonja Morgan can attest, lighting her abundance candle helps her with all of her opportunities and attract wealth.
Baby Fridge: The refrigerator you build when you want to recreate the magic of a huge, farmers market-style monstrosity but no longer live in your Malibu mansion.
Baja Shelf: Otherwise known as an Acapulco shelf, Cabo shelf, or tanning shelf, or, if you've truly no idea, "a cliff." This refers to the pool entry, in this case it being a shelf or set of stairs that allows one to enter a backyard pool in stages. Please refer to the elegant English garden party Lisa Vanderpump threw for Ken, in which he slipped right off the shelf, to the detriment of his fancy Italian loafers.
Bassano Rooster: A beautiful Italian knick-knack that was a staple of Vicki Gunvalson's kitchen for years. Due to overwhelming interest in the rooster, she decided to auction it off for a good cause.
The Berkshires: A mythical land in rural Massachusetts, known for its quaint villages, outdoor activities, fall foliage, farm-to-table dining and also Dorinda Medley's vacation home. She cooked, she decorated, she made it nice.
Champagne Room: No, it's not what you think. This is Heather Dubrow's chateau, not a dirty strip club we're talking about! This home element is exactly what it sounds like: A room dedicated specifically to champagne. It can be used both for storage and to pay homage to a theme. Think champagne doorbells.
Chateau Sheree: An Atlanta home that took over five years of construction to complete, and whose housewarming invitations were marked with rhinestone belts.
Chateau She-Can't-Pay: An alternate moniker for Chateau Sheree, albeit a much snarkier one.
Etched Window: A piece of glass with a very artful (emphasis on artful) design carved into it. If you're Heather Dubrow, your etched window portrays your family tree, complete with special placement for your still-frozen embryos.
Jerusalem Tile: A stone that was imported directly from the holy land of Jerusalem and delivered right to Kathryn Edwards' San Diego estate.
Maxxinista: Someone who is both stylish and appreciates a good deal, most typically from TJ Maxx. See: Ramona Singer.
Mirrored Fridge: For all those times that you want both a) a snack and b) to make sure your hair and outfit are on point. Credit to Kim Zolciak Biermann.
Moore Manor: Kenya Moore's 7,200-square-foot Atlanta-area home, which boasts features like floor-to-ceiling marble bathrooms, a beautiful view of the trees and decor accouterments that may or may not be from Ikea.
Toaster Oven: A major design element in Sonja Morgan's Lenox Hill townhouse, left over from her domestic goddess days.
Villa Rosa: The quaint 8,800 Beverly Hills cottage, to which Lisa Vanderpump and her husband Ken downsized from their original mansion.