Well that was fun!
It's always a good time when Dancing with the Stars takes on different decades, and tonight was no exception. We had a particularly good time in the earlier part of the century, with the Charleston and James Hinchcliffe's 40s jitterbug.
However, not everyone survived the trip back in time, and someone had to go home tonight. That someone was Maureen McCormick, who probably was not the worst dancer on the floor, but ended up with the short end of the stick anyway.
In other news, Len Goodman returned from his hiatus for one week only, mostly just to let all the pros know they didn't have enough of their dances in their dances, and it was great to see him for a second.
Now let's talk about the routines, shall we?
Laurie Hernandez and Val Chmerkovskiy: 34/40
Laurie Hernandez for Grease 2 Live, please.
Ryan Lochte and Cheryl Burke: 28/40
As the judges said, "Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" is an epic song, and that dance wasn't nearly epic enough to go with it.
Marilu Henner and Derek Hough: 29/40
Just as we were over here like, "that was incredible," the judges kinda trashed it. Guess we're just suckers for a lively Charleston.
Calvin Johnson and Lindsay Arnold: 36/40
So we love Calvin. We're Calvin's biggest fans, and we're also fans of his dances, but do these two have any emotions other than "happiest people on the planet?" Just wondering, even though we love pretty much everything these two do.
Maureen McCormick and Artem Chigvintsev: 28/40
That was fun. A bit slower and a little more basic than we would have liked, but fun.
Terra Jole and Sasha Farber: 34/40
Terra seems to dance a lot of old movie-style dances. It's fine, and they're all wonderful, but there just seem to be a lot of them.
Jana Kramer and Gleb Savchenko: 34/40
Something felt slightly off, but not with Jana's dancing. It was just kind of a lot of all kinds of things happening in all different directions. That said, we had a great time watching it.
James Hinchcliffe and Sharna Burgess: 36/40
James always looks like a professional Broadway dancer, so we are kind of obsessed with how theatrical his dances have become. We're also just obsessed with him.
Team Past: James and Sharna, Calvin and Lindsay, Maureen and Artem, Ryan and Cheryl: 38/40
Very thrown off by Team Past's use of the Outlander theme Skye Boat Song, but that was a mesmerizingly beautiful dance.
Team Future: Terra and Sasha, Jana and Gleb, Laurie and Val, Marilu and Derek: 35/40
Julianne was right about the Divergent vibes, and all the judges were right about how this performance was not very in sync. It did, however, tell a story. We don't know what that story was, but it was very futuristic, so they should get some extra points for that.
Dancing with the Stars airs Mondays at 8 p.m. on ABC.