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Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Cannes


This is a safe space.

The entire world is still shaken, even now hours after the news of Brad Pittand Angelina Jolie's divorce. It's going to take a long time to recover and start processing all of our collective thoughts about it. And, for some, that processing involves asking a lot of questions.

But that's okay! Everybody grieves different, and apparently a lot of people we know grieve by texting their friends and/or family who work at E! News. We surely can't blame them—we are the entertainment experts, so what else is a person to do when they have a celebrity question that needs answering? They come to us.

They come to us with conspiracy theories like whether they were married at all. They come to us with (wholly unsolicited advice) that they'd like us to pass along to Angie or Brad. You know, on our daily text message to the A-listers. They come to us wondering what the deal is with their kids again. 

Because it's just so entertaining, we're sharing these random thoughts and matters with you. All identities have been hidden, because as we said, this is a safe space. At least for now, while the questions aren't too stupid. 

"TBH I didn't even realize Brangelina got married."

"Is this true?!" [Ed note: Of course it's true...it's on E!]

"Angelina Jolie filed for divorce? I thought it was something important."

"Someone should tell Angie about glass houses."

"So should I have a Marion Cotillard marathon now?"

"Does anyone stay together anymore?"

"What did Brad and Angie do by the sea again?"

"Didn't Brad and Jen divorce, like, ten years ago?"

"Are we still allowed to watch Mr. & Mrs. Smith?"

"I can't wait for the Nicki Minaj lyric about this part."

"Where's Rachel Green's mom's advice when we need it?!"

"What if they just each took three kids?"

"They may be getting divorced, but at least they can afford to new wireless headphones for the iPhone 7. Still not over my headphone jack."

"But Blake and Ryan are still together, right?"

"So, who do you think Brad's gonna date next?"

Too soon, guys, too soon.