AP Photo/J. Scott ApplewhitePresident Barack Obama wants to leave the world a better place for his daughters, so he's focusing on some of the really important issues facing the U.S. today: feminism and equality.
Obama, a father to two girls, has learned a lot since becoming a dad, and in a new essay for Glamour's September issue, the president is hoping to shed some light on what he's discovered about himself and what he hopes for the future. Although he and First Lady Michelle Obama have strived to give their daughters a normal upbringing all things considered, the president admits that most of the time the responsibilities fell on his wife.
"I've seen how Michelle has balanced the demands of a busy career and raising a family. Like many working mothers, she worried about the expectations and judgments of how she should handle the trade-offs, knowing that few people would question my choices," he writes of his early political career. "And the reality was that when our girls were young, I was often away from home serving in the state legislature, while also juggling my teaching responsibilities as a law professor. I can look back now and see that, while I helped out, it was usually on my schedule and on my terms. The burden disproportionately and unfairly fell on Michelle."
His hindsight revelation has caused him not only to be aware of the struggles women face every day, but also how it affects his children.
"So I'd like to think that I've been pretty aware of the unique challenges women face—it's what has shaped my own feminism. But I also have to admit that when you're the father of two daughters, you become even more aware of how gender stereotypes pervade our society," he writes. "You see the subtle and not-so-subtle social cues transmitted through culture. You feel the enormous pressure girls are under to look and behave and even think a certain way."
But along the way Obama learned to separate his two jobs: dad and president. But without a father of his own, he admits he struggled to find his identity. As a result, he succumbed to peer pressure and societal pressure to become a macho man. "It's easy to absorb all kinds of messages from society about masculinity and come to believe that there's a right way and a wrong way to be a man," he writes.
"But as I got older, I realized that my ideas about being a tough guy or cool guy just weren't me. They were a manifestation of my youth and insecurity. Life became a lot easier when I simply started being myself."
And being himself has helped both him and FLOTUS to bestow important lessons on Malia Obama and Sasha Obama. Living in the spotlight, Malia and Sasha have been taught to say something if faced with certain pressures. "As a parent, helping your kids to rise above these constraints is a constant learning process," Obama notes. "Michelle and I have raised our daughters to speak up when they see a double standard or feel unfairly judged based on their gender or race—or when they notice that happening to someone else."
But he doesn't want them to do it alone. In fact, the president says it's "important" that his daughters know he calls himself a "feminist" because "it is absolutely men's responsibility to fight sexism, too."