Why It's Time to Accept That Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck Are Separated

Happily separated parents of three have been reconciling for months now, according to reports that are way off

By Natalie Finn Jul 27, 2016 9:09 PMTags
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Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck announced more than a year ago that they had separated.

For 10 months before that, they'd been on a trial separation.

So they have had a considerable amount of time to discuss family matters, revamp their routines and try to get past any animosity. There were some bumps in the road after their split went public, particularly pertaining to the headlines that circulated about what really drove them apart. Feelings were hurt, patience was tested.

But for months now, it appears that the parents of three have settled into their new normal and are what we might call amiably separated.

So they're great. It's the rest of the world that seems to be having a really tough time adjusting.

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Today marked the umpteenth story about a possible reconciliation for Garner and Affleck, a report touting plans for a "second honeymoon" in Turks and Caicos—the scene of their nuptials in 2005.

Supposedly Affleck is all over Garner to steal away with him so that they can continue the rebuilding process, which, if you take a glance at a lot of what's been written about them lately, has been going on for months.

However, multiple sources tell E! News that this story is false, just as stories about the actors working on getting back together that have come before were false.

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"There are no plans for a second honeymoon anywhere," says one source. "They are 100 percent still separated and focused on co-parenting for the kids' sake."

Another insider adds, "It is a fabricated story. They are not honeymooning, but they are just continuing along."

And yet rumors of their imminent reconciliation have continued to circulate, despite all valid evidence pointing to the fact that Garner and Affleck are merely doing everything in their power to make their breakup less weird for daughters Violet and Seraphina and son Samuel.

Hence the family waiting out the initial split headlines while all together in the Bahamas last July, despite tensions running high between the ex-couple, not to mention every travel decision they've made since to ensure a smooth transition for the kids.

After the Bahamas, Affleck lived on the property Garner was renting while shooting Miracles From Heaven in Atlanta so he'd be readily available to resume Dad duties. He flew to L.A. and attended Comic-Con in San Diego last year, then went back to Atlanta again, and so on.

In May, Garner packed up the kids and they went to London, where Affleck was shooting Justice League. The family also vacationed in Paris during that time, soaking up the culture.

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So when they spent this past Fourth of July together, too, it was more of the same family-friendly fun.

Now, Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck are certainly not the first famous couple to break up and then spend time together, prompting the inevitable question: Are they getting back together?

Hilary Duff and Mike Comrie, who are parents of son Luca together, were among the usual subjects of speculation, up until their divorce was finalized at least. And some duos who kept right on hanging out have reconciled. Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green were in the middle of a divorce last year, but now their third child is arriving any second.

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But even Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow, who also took a family vacation to the Bahamas while news of their "conscious uncoupling" made the rounds in 2014, were only shadowed by rumors for so much time before the suspense wore off.

Was the permanence of Martin and Paltrow's split more believable for some reason than Affleck and Garner's? Who knew this particular Bennifer was such a favorite that there'd be this much trouble letting them go?!

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To up the ridiculous ante, Garner—who has proved that being a mom of three already does not disqualify an actress from being the target of relentless pregnancy speculation—has even had to field questions about that once again. "How 'bout that?" she congenially fired back at paparazzi last night when a guy shooting video quizzed her about the rumor that has only gone away when she actually was pregnant. Then she turned to her friend and said, "He told me he's right here," seemingly in reference to the driver she was hoping would be right there to whisk her away.

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The approach will likely change if Garner or Affleck pops up with a new significant other—then all the how-serious-is-it speculation will revert to the new couple. Chris and Gwyneth's divorce was just finalized this month, so it's possible that everyone would have been wondering about them all this time as well if neither had started dating again.

But the constant re-shipping of Jen and Ben is awfully aggressive when it seems fairly obvious that they're focusing on their kids and had a lot of stuff to work out, hence any post-split counseling or other activities that may have made it look like they were getting back to their old married ways.

Because the fact that they're getting along is not a reason to assume they're trying to reconnect as a couple. Same deal with Affleck referring to Garner as his "wife" on Bill Simmons' HBO show (yes, he talked about how his "wife" encourage his directing career, in between the 19 F-bombs). They were married for 10 years, certain habits don't go away so quickly. He has also been saying nothing but the sweetest things about Jen, calling her a "superhero mom" and otherwise giving credit where it's due.

We haven't consulted any psychics, so who knows what happens down the road. But for now, what Garner and Affleck are doing is being full-time parents while navigating what can be very murky waters. And that's why it's time to let just them be separated. If that's what's working out best for them, that should be good enough for everyone else.

Watch: Ben Affleck Calls Jennifer Garner a "Superhero Mom"
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