HBOCaution! This article contains spoilers for the Game of Thrones episode, "The Door." Proceed at your own risk.
WHAT?
We say again: WHAT?!
In one fell swoop, so many things just changed on Game of Thrones. We saw Hodor die, and we witnessed him go from the nice, talkative boy named Wylis to the one word Hodor we all knew and loved…and it turns out that those two events were intricately linked, and happened at exactly the same time, despite also happening decades apart.
Bran's visions went from a harmless, fun way to find out what really happened when Ned and his cohorts were young to something seriously dangerous time travel. After learning how white walkers were made, thanks to a dagger wielded by the elf-like children of the forest (who then appeared in the cave), Bran came in contact with an army of white walkers, led by the Night's King. The king could not only see Bran, but he could touch him, and he left him with a mark that lasted even when Bran woke back up in the cave.
That allowed the white walkers to not only find him, but also enter the cave where he, Meera, Hodor, and the raven were hiding. The panicked raven told them they all needed to get out, after Bran became him.
"Am I ready?" Bran asked.
"No," said the raven, and he began the process of turning Bran into him anyway.
As the white walkers descended on the cave, Bran was still in a vision, with the raven. From the yard of Winterfell, he watched the raven disappear in front of him as the king stabbed and killed him back in the cave. He also heard Meera yelling at him to wake up and warg into Hodor, because they needed Hodor to help them escape from the relentless army of creepy skeletons.
Bran didn't wake up, but he did warg into Hodor, and Hodor led the way to a large door, pulling Bran all the way, while Bran listened from Winterfell. Once they got through the door, with the walkers trapped on the other side, Meera continued on and gave Hodor an order: Hold the door.
"Hold the door," she said, and "hold the door," young Hodor/Wylis said back in Winterfell as he fell into a seizure. What?!
The door wasn't much of a match for the walkers, and they got through it easily and began to tear Hodor apart. Wylis' seizing got worse, as he just continued to say "hold the door, hold the door," over and over again, and it slowly morphed into "hodor," and that's the devastating origin of Hodor. He was traumatized by his own death.
At least Meera and Bran got away, and at least Hodor died a valiant death, but damn. That was rough.
Elsewhere in the seven kingdoms:
—Sansa further established herself as the woman we trust to take back the North. She got to confront Littlefinger, and that snivelly little man was basically crumbs between her fingers as she destroyed him for forcing her to marry Ramsay Bolton. He claimed he had no idea that Ramsay was the nightmare he was, and he did seem sorry, but we can't say we'd be that upset if Sansa really did have Brienne do away with him. She told him she never wanted to see him again, but before he went, he did give her a bit of tip about her great uncle gathering forces and retaking Riverrun, which could help when she's in need of an army.
As she and Jon made their plans for taking the North, she did offer that bit of help, but lied about how she knew, which confused Brienne.
—Arya went to a play! She was tasked with killing the actress playing Cersei in a very strange stage recreation of Robert's death, which also featured Ned as the ultimate village idiot. She wasn't very into the idea of killing such a "decent" woman, but Jaqen explained that death doesn't leave the decent behind. (There was also a close up of a penis in one of these scenes. There was no reason for it. Progress!)
—The Greyjoys needed a new leader, and Yara was struggling to get the men of her house to trust her when there was another male heir standing right there. Theon stood up for her, saying she was the best possible leader, until Euron showed up and straight-up admitted he killed Balon. They named him the king, drowned him for a bit, and when he regained consciousness, he had one thing on his mind: kill his niece and nephew.
Fortunately for them and unfortunately for him, Yara and Theon were long gone on the Greyjoys' best ships, but who knows how long they have until he catches up to them.
—Jorah tried to bid adieu to the Khaleesi, banishing himself this time due to his worsening greyscale. She didn't accept this, however, and instead ordered him to search the world until he found a cure, and then return to her to rule the seven kingdoms by her side.
—Tyrion and Varys hosted a visit from Volantis' Red Priestess to make sure that everyone was on the same page in terms of which ruler they were supporting. She reminded Varys of when he was castrated, and how a voice spoke to him from the fire. This seemed to convince him that they were, in fact, on the same page, but we would have liked a little bit more explanation there.
Remember when the biggest thing going into this season was the fate of Jon Snow? That feels like a lifetime ago.
To console ourselves, let's just look at this forever, OK?
RIP Hodor. You will be missed.
Game of Thrones airs Sundays at 9 p.m. on HBO.