George Pimentel/Getty Images for Virginia Black Whiskey1-800-HOTLINE BLING? Yes, we're calling for Drake. He's hosting Saturday Night Live this weekend and we have some ideas.
Okay, so it turns out that the Hotline Bling isn't exactly for tips, it's meant to be used for slightly more provocative conversations. But either way, it's time to talk about the man, the myth, the legend, the Drake. He'll be taking the top spot on SNL for the second time (and for the second time, he'll be acting as the host and musical guest), so naturally he needs to upstage himself.
Pressure? Nah. This is the star of Degrassi we're talking about! But that said, we thought we'd do Drizzy a solid and give him a few ideas for characters and sketches he could try out, just in case he's been too busy listening to Views to study his lines. You got this, Drake.
1. A sketch about a guy who just found out that Kraft Macaroni & Cheese took out that awesome orange coloring.
It's Living Under a Rock Guy! Now, watch his world crumble as he contemplates what life will be like with (gulp) yellow Kraft maraconi & cheese.
2. A pizza delivery man character with the sickest dance moves ever.
Why order just a pizza when you could order a pizza and a bomb-ass dance party at the same time? Pizza for you, running man for you.
3. Forget your lines, Drake? Flash your pearly whites while you rack your brain.
When in doubt, just smile. That creepy grin is the perfect way to distract the audience from your mistakes.
4. It's a snow day, y'all!!
Snowstorms plus convertibles plus a day off from school? This is comedy gold, guys.
5. Jazzercise gone wrong.
It's not an episode of Saturday Night Live without some choreographed numbers. Just make sure to remember your sweat band and shortie shorts, Drizzy.
6. Always remember what's most important: That your clothes look good.
SNL may be live, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't break character if one of your pant legs gets screwed up. Fashion is always more important than comedic integrity.
7. Take on the Target lady.
Anything Kristen Wiig can do, Drake can do better. Just look at that wide-eyed grin. Coupons!
8. Wear all the chains. All of them.
It's clearly where you get your magical powers, Drake. Don your gold and walk among legends.
9. A skit about auditioning for the next Star Wars.
Move out the way, Alden Ehrenreich, because Drake is clearly the best Han Solo. That light saber work would play great on SNL.
10. Know that prop gags will always kill.
Drake by himself? Meh, pretty funny. Drake with a fake spider? Now you're talking.