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Tracy Morgan, The Tonight Show

Andrew Lipovsky/NBC

Learning to laugh again is easier said than done.

In a new interview with Rolling Stone, Tracy Morgan reflected on the 2014 accident that nearly claimed his life. As one might imagine, the recovery process was arduous. "I said, 'If my funny ever went away, I'd die.' And I thought I was going to die for a long time. My thoughts—I was in a very dark place. I was sitting right here, contemplating suicide," he revealed. "I couldn't walk."

Today, Tracy is standing tall—even if he still walks with a limp, a constant reminder of his life-altering accident. The Saturday Night Live and 30 Rock vet now makes it a point to acknowledge the many things he has to live for, like his wife, Megan Wollover, 29, their daughter, Maven Morgan, 2, and his three kids from a previous marriage. Tracy also remains convinced that he visited the afterlife while in a coma, and while there, he claims to have seen his late father, Jimmy Morgan, who died of AIDS in 1987. Tracy joked that he avoided heaven's white light because he "thought it was the police." In all seriousness, he believes his dad is responsible for sending him back to Earth. "He was the one who said, 'Go home, son. I ain't ready for you yet.' I don't think I cheated death. I think this was the plan," Tracy explained. "My room wasn't ready."

Indeed. According to the comedian, "I still have s--t here to do. It's gonna take more than 18 wheels for me to get out of here. I have to raise my girl, raise my wife, raise my family. Gotta keep my octopus alive. Gotta keep my sharks alive. Those are God's creatures! I'm needed!" Tracy claimed he returned from the afterlife "bearing gifts" from the comedy gods. "Maybe when I was in heaven, Richard Pryor said something to me," he said. "I feel funnier than I ever felt."

Jokes aside, Tracy's road to recovery is far from over. The comic admitted that he suffers from survivor's guilt because his mentor, James NcNair, died in the same crash. "Emotionally, it's hard for me to deal with," said Tracy, who sees a psychiatrist. "I asked everybody to be there that night. I have to live with that. But I had to forgive myself. I know Jimmy would want it like that." Dealing with that grief made his recovery process even harder. "A doctor said, 'The two biggest accidents in the world was yours and Princess Diana.' Think about it. That's heavy s--t."

If you or someone you know needs help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).