If you're among those who think that real life is sorely lacking for pie fights...
Happy National Pie Day!
While the actual-ish holiday, sponsored by the American Pie Council since 1986, is ostensibly an occasion to pay tribute to the pastry miracle that occurs when crust meets filling and indulge to your heart's content, there's also something to be said for the result of a pie's other culturally significant purpose through the years.
From the days of Laurel and Hardy and The Three Stooges, to George Romero's original Dawn of the Dead (has anyone on The Walking Dead tried fighting back with pie yet?), to Jason Biggs turning the tables and assaulting a defenseless pie, there's a reason why pie fights have been considered hilarious for a cool century now. (And presumably longer, but the Instagrams must have been awfully blurry back then.)
And we felt this was the perfect day to remind people of a seminal night in pie-fighting: Oct. 30, 2013.
Everything was going along, the boys were jamming together on "Teenage Dirtbag," the ecstatic crowd was singing along (and luckily a few intrepid souls were taking video) when a couple of members of the tour crew approached Zayn Malik and Louis Tomlinson with tins full of shaving cream masquerading as pies.
Zayn and Louis darted across the stage but got dinged just as they fled to the wings. Harry Styles, caught in the crossfire, flung water in every direction in the spirit of getting messy along with his mates—and then took a pie right to the kisser.
Not sure what happened to Zayn, but Louis returned and made sure one of the instigators got a taste of his own medicine as Harry, who had slipped in the cream that was now all over the stage, made his way to his feet, laughing all the way.
Then Louis (good he got all of this out of his system before becoming a dad) got a hold of a full tin, strolled over to the original perpetrator and nailed him squarely in the face.
"I'm the winner of the day!" an unscathed Liam Payne announced triumphantly.
"How are we supposed to put on a serious show? We are serious artists!" Harry cracked. "I did warn you," Liam explained to the audience, "it was going to get messy."
Luke Hemmings, who had not-so-mysteriously tweeted beforehand that he was looking forward to the pranks to come, guessed shaving foam.
"I thought it was cream, but it didn't taste like cream," Harry mused. "No, no, no, it tastes horrible, actually," Louis agreed.
We suggest that all of you at home stick to whipped cream or meringue. Happy National Pie Die everybody!