Ben and Jerry'sBen and Jerry's released their top-selling flavors of 2015 and, of course, Half-Baked came out at number one. According to Brand Eating, the half cookie dough, half brownie concoction has held the top spot for the past three years. Personally, we're a Chocolate Fudge Brownie person, which came in at number three.
Cherry Garcia beat out our favorite which makes zero sense to us. What kind of person prefers cherries to chocolate!? Sure CG has fudge flakes and whatnot, but that is so not the same as biting into delicious baked brownie goodness, amiright? In an effort to understand what kind of human prefers Chunky Monkey to Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, we went through every flavor in order of their ranking and determined what each one says about your personality.
For example, if you enjoy the flavor above, you're 14-years-old, and the name makes you "tee-hee" because, you know, pot jokes. That, or you're the kind of girl who can't decide between your sequined UGG's or the plain gray, just like you couldn't decide between cookie dough or brownies. Get ready to know yourself on a whole new level. You'll never look at a pint of Phish Food the same.
2. Cherry Garcia. In second place is this classic. If you're eating Cherry Garcia, you know who this ice cream was named after, attended their concerts and thought this was a groovy way to remember your glory days. In other words, you're kinda old because who the heck likes fruit in their ice cream?
3. Chocolate Fudge Brownie. You're currently Bridget Jonesing on the couch being careful not to drip tears into your pint. Your friends made you download Tinder after your breakup in an effort to get you out of the house, but the only people you trust with your heart now are Ben and Jerry.
4. Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough. This ice cream is the reason PMS exists. You couldn't convince yourself to eat a raw log of pre-made cookie dough, so this ice cream was your next best option. You've been crying at a lot of PETA commercials this week and to paraphrase Mean Girls, your sweatpants are all that fit you right now.
5. Phish Food. The band by the same name is your guilty pleasure. You have road-tripped to see them countless times as a teen. You used to wear patchwork pants, Vans and a wallet chain in your mid-teens. You moved to New York for three months after college and still tell everyone you're from there. At night, you spoon feed this to yourself under a Pendleton blanket as you long for the fading days of your youth.
6. Americone Dream. You bought this when it first came out because you thought it was charmingly witty. The waffle cone bits get stuck in your gums, but you keep it in your freezer anyway because even your ice cream needs to be as cultured as you are. In high school, you were on the debate team, and now you enjoy flat whites in your corner office at Google.
7. Chunky Monkey. This is another ice cream and fruit situation, which means you've got an AARP card. This is in that one grandma's freezer who really isn't supposed to be eating these things. You've got high blood pressure and strange veins on your legs but you DGAF. Your grown children think you're taking afternoon water aerobics at the local YMCA, but you're really at the VFW shooting pool and smoking Cloves.
8. The Tonight Dough. You're an empty-nester as your three kids just went off to college. The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon keeps you company while you adjust to a new life without your kiddos. You turn it up when you do the nightly dishes, so it feels like someone is still there. When you saw this at your local grocer, you thought something like, "how funky!" When you sent a pic of it to all three kids, nobody replied. It's going to be okay.
9. Strawberry Cheesecake. You OD'd on the chocolate brownie situation from earlier, and your gut is paying for it. Maybe those old people are onto something with their fruity ice cream?
10. Salted Caramel Core. You're ten, and your mom bought you five pints of this for your sleepover. She laid out extra toppings for you and your pals because she's a cool mom like that. In the middle of the night one of your friends will barf in their sleeping bag from going too heavy on that caramel core. Yolo, though.
Watch Kristin Dos Santos try Harry Potter-style butterbeer ice cream!
Which one is your favorite flavor? Tell us in the comments!
(Originally published on Friday, Jan. 8, 2016, at 4:16 p.m. PDT.)