Lindsay Scheinberg/E! IllustrationToldja. It's TO DIE FOR, right?
Scream Queens' premiere episode has finally been released to the world, and well, welcome to the mayhem that is being a crazy, obsessed fan. I am so right there with you.
Every Tuesday night, I'll be dropping a little scoop bomb on you right as each episode ends, with some fun analysis of what went down, and inside info no one else has on what lies ahead. I'll also be doing a Live Periscope Q&A as each episode ends on the East Coast. Follow me on Twitter for it: @KristinDSantos.
First though, I really do want to know exactly what you thought about the premiere, so please make sure to tweet me (@Kristindsantos) and take the poll below!
Now let's dig deep into this INSANELY GLORIOUS show that is Scream Queens!
What Lies Ahead:
1. The Baby in the Bathtub is HUGE. Not you know, literally, and not that there's anything wrong with cherubic infants. But the mystery of which 20-year-old Wallace student is the baby whose mother died at the Kappa party in 1995 is the thruline of the entire series. "As we go along, we revisit that mystery every episode," Scream Queens creator Ryan Murphy tells me. ‘Who is the baby?' is the thread that is going to weed our hero and heroines to finding out the clue of why is somebody killing all of these Kappa people."
2. The Baby Still COULD BE Grace. You know how she said she's only 18, and her mother died when she was 2, so it can't be her? Well, Ryan drops this little bomb: "Maybe her father lied about that....Wait until you see what Oliver Hudson ends up doing. That's the fun of it. Oliver Hudson is this great guy, and we have him do some of the most crazy stuff."
3. NO ONE Is What They Seem. "I love that you think that, because then when it happens you'll be like, ‘Holy shit. How'd that happen?' But that's all built into the fun of the show. The fun of it is people like Lea [Michele] and Skyler [Samuels] and Oliver and Nasim [Pedrad] who you would just presume are sweet as pie and good is gold because in many ways that's their persona, what we want them to be. Uh-huh not in this show. That's the fun of it.
4. You have not seen the last of Ariana Grande's "No. 2." Could be a flashback, but she'll be on the show again. Ditto Nick Jonas! He will be back for a few more episodes.
5. Nasim Pedrad and Jamie Lee Curtis have a bed scene that will kill you. In the next episode (and it's not what you think). It had me laughing so hard, I had to pause, roll on the floor, find a paper bag to breathe into, and I'm still crying laughing as I type this.
6. The Red Devil costume might be worn by more than one person. But NOT Pretty Little Liars style.
7. The muffs are mysterious. Billie Lourd (Number 5) teased that her earmuffs are not just an homage to her mother Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher), but also hold a mystery to them of their own. (Theory: Is she listening to something/someone?!)
8. Three will be delicious company. The epic Chad (Glen Powell) and Chanel (Emma Roberts) romance is quickly becoming a love triangle. Guesses on the third wheel? Oh, and I'm not talking about Boone (Nick Jonas!). It's a female.
9. There's also a same-sex flirtation brewing within the Kappa house. Hmmm....
10. Get more juicy scoop in the live Periscope I just did at the end of our Scream Queens party!
I'm going to the Kappa house this Monday (fingers crossed!) in New Orleans, so tweet me any questions you have: @KristinDSantos!
Theory of the week: Oliver Hudson (Grace's Dad, Wes) is craaaazaaaaayyy suspicious. Remember how Grace found a mixed tape in the bathtub down in the basement? And remember how Wes himself said that playlists are his thing??? Specifically from 1995? Well, I'd bet my neckbrace I wore to tonight's Squad SQ party that he was there in the Kappa house that night. Maybe the father? Also, just me or the girl holding the baby looks SO MUCH like Nasim Pedrad (Gigi)? What kind of traumatic event from the 90's do you think stuck her in her Firenza skirt?
CURRENT THEORY ON THE KILLER: Wes. Avenging his baby momma's death.
CURRENT THEORY ON THE BABY: Grace. And Wes is a liar.
Join us next week for the next SQ Scoop Bomb and make sure you pledge Squad SQ by tweeting me a photo of you holding a sign that says #SQUAD SQ. Once you're in, I'll tell you how to get private scoop!
Good night, idiot hookers! May you sleep well and with your hands on the frog.