Rumer Willis Used to Be Self-Conscious About Her Curvy Body: "I Just Wanted to Look Tiny and Androgynous"

"I was constantly bullied because of my looks," the Dancing With the Stars winner says

By Zach Johnson Jun 11, 2015 3:43 PMTags
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These days, Rumer Willis looks and feels like her best self.

As a Hollywood teen, though, Demi Moore and Bruce Willis' eldest daughter was more self-conscious about her appearance. "When you grow up in the public eye the way that I did, everyone's looking at you and waiting for you to do something crazy or say something wrong or have a meltdown," the most recent Dancing With the Stars champion recalls in Glamour magazine's July issue, on newsstands June 16. "I was constantly bullied because of my looks, so I struggled a lot with my body image. I wanted to have no butt; I wanted to have no boobs."

She adds, "For a long time I just wanted to look tiny and androgynous."

Being trailed by the paparazzi only exacerbated those insecurities.

"There were times when personal stuff in my life was blasted everywhere and I couldn't leave my house for a week because I would be aggressively and dangerously followed," Rumer says. "But the real pressure comes from the Internet and social media—the mentality that it's OK to attack people from behind a computer screen. Strangers say the nastiest things. Until recently the thought of making one misstep that could be criticized would stop me from trying new things and from standing up for myself."

Watch: Rumer Willis Wants to Give Country Music a Try

Enter Dancing With the Stars.

The Sorority Row star decided to compete on the ABC series to overcome her fear of failure. "Fear is a really debilitating emotion," the actress admits. Though she "didn't know what to expect" when she signed on, Rumer tells Glamour she "came in with an open mind" and was ready to work long and hard.

"The first day I danced on-air, I was nervous; I had been struggling, and the dress rehearsal hadn't gone well," says the House Bunny star, who was paired with pro dancer Val Chmerkovskiy. "But after I finished I felt more beautiful than I had in my entire life. Not because of how I looked—it's not about having on a fancy dress or having your hair and makeup done—but because of what I'd accomplished and worked so hard for. When you conquer something you didn't think you could do, energy and confidence radiate out of you, and that's more beautiful than if you were skinny or had the perfect face."

As she wowed the judges and viewers alike, Rumer had hoped the online bullying would end. It didn't. "Just because I was celebrated on Dancing With the Stars doesn't mean the bullying has stopped," she admits. "After the show started, I had to block almost 10 people every day on social media because they wouldn't leave me alone. But when it happens now, I remind myself that focusing on people's negative opinions will only make me feel like crap. If I start to get discouraged, I take a step back and go, 'All right, I don't feel great today, but what can I do to shift how I'm thinking? It's difficult, but the moment you stop saying, 'I'm really fat,' or 'I'm ugly,' and just say, 'Wow, I have this,' then you'll see a change."

Rumer hopes that by sharing her story, people will treat each other more kindly. "What it comes down to is this: We all need to stop bullying ourselves and being cruel to other women. Attacking one another instead of supporting one another has become the norm. Life's hard enough as it is. Let's find strength in the fact that we're different and unique. Let's allow ourselves to say, 'These are my flaws, but I'm still beautiful.' Let's find our own value, know what we have to offer—and know that that is enough."