Is Shia LaBeouf Actually a Lumberjack? We Investigate

We look at the evidence

By Seija Rankin Apr 28, 2015 7:24 PMTags
Shia LaBeoufGoodwin/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES

Shia LaBeouf has been going through a lot of changes recently. He got a rattail. He got a mohawk. He started growing a fish farm. And now it seems he might have changed his career completely.

Yesterday the actor (or, should we say, on-again off-again actor) was spotted at TreePeople Park in Studio City, CA, collecting an large number of logs. He was decked out in full log-collecting regalia, too, from his heavy duty combat boots to his professional lumberjacking gloves. (Or what we assume to be lumberjacking gloves, as we've never worn any ourselves.)

After we saw these photos we got to thinking: Is Shia LaBeouf actually a lumberjack? Have we all been living a lie for decades, going about our days with the false assumption that Shia LaBeouf is an actor and not, in fact, a lumberjack? We decided to do some investigating. 

First we take a long, hard look at the evidence. Here he is again, collecting and hauling his precious logs:

Goodwin/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES
Goodwin/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES

As you can see, he really knows his way around a tree trunk, much in the way that a professional lumberjack would. It's like he's one with the trees, so much so that it makes us again wonder, "Is Shia LaBeouf a lumberjack?" We can't really imagine what use an urban professional such as Shia would have for a large amount of logs, outside of lumberjacking duties.

But this wouldn't be a fair investigation unless we gave each side a deep scrutiny. So here is the evidence for the argument that Shia LaBeouf isn't actually a lumberjack. For starters, he's never actually discussed a passion for logs or any skills that would be relevant to someone who lives in the woods and harvests and transports trees. Sure, he is great at crying in art galleries and drawing on paper bags, but those talents don't serve you very well in the Great Northwest.

Next we turn to his Twitter to see if he's been giving out any hints as to a possible newfound profession. (We told you guys, this investigation is going deep.). We found the following:

To be honest, we're not really sure of what to make of this. He's clearly trying to relay some sort important (and secret) message, but we're not entirely sure that it involves lumberjacking—unless he's going to use this so-called Katana Samurai Sword to cut down his trees. For now we're just going to have to consider this an open investigation and keep on digging. We won't rest until the truth is found.