Mila Kunis has the mommy blues—but not the typical mommy blues.
"It's really weird to be out," the Jupiter Ascending actress confessed on Jimmy Kimmel Live! Tuesday. "This is my very first time out and about. Swear to God! I left [my daughter Wyatt Isabelle] at home yesterday for the first time during the premiere. It's frightening. I have to be honest. I was with her every day for the first four months of her little life. I cried. I did. It's weird. It's very strange. If anyone's a mom, and being a stay-at-home mom, it's a very weird feeling to all of a sudden leave your child."
"It's not that I don't trust who she's with," Kunis said. "It's just the idea of not being with her."
"You mean you don't trust [Ashton Kutcher] because he'd be using her as a prop in a Punk'd sketch or something like that?" Jimmy Kimmel joked. Kunis laughed, saying, "I trust him! He's an incredible father! But the way that I hold the baby and the way that he holds the baby...I mean, he's like a jungle gym!"
Kimmel also noted that Kunis lost her baby weight "like, immediately."
"It's been four months," the actress said.
"Yeah, but that's impressive," Kimmel said.
"Breastfeeding is like working out," Kunis explained.
"I have a daughter. She's 6 months. I've been trying that," Kimmel joked. "She won't latch on."
In all seriousness, what else did Kunis do to get back in shape?
"I am very active. I hike almost every day with her," she said. "I strap her in a papoose and away we go."
Kunis hasn't hired any help, but her Ukrainian mother has offered her services—and it's been a quite an experience. "I was cloth-diapered. In Russia, 31 years ago, they didn't have the current-day diapers. Everything was cloth, which means you sanitize them in a hot bucket, you dry them, you iron them, you hang them, you pin them, and that's how I was raised. When I showed my mom diapers—current diapers, with Velcros and Elmos on them—she was like, 'I don't understand what this is. What do I do?' I was like, 'Mommy, you lift the baby up, stick it under and Velcro.' 'And then just throw in the trash?' I was like, 'Away it goes!' And she was like, 'Well, if I had this, I would just have seven babies. This is amazing,'" the actress said. "But, literally, it took her the longest time to stop putting it upside down. Like, she would put the Velcro on top and I was like, 'No, no, no! On the bottom!' Like, she will cloth-diaper the baby—any baby!—but these Velcro things really got her. Very different. Very, very different."
Wyatt Isabelle's grandparents are spoiling her rotten. "My dad has gone crazy buying her things! Like her very first cell phone and the piano kicker and the Baby Einstein Imaginarium," Kunis told Kimmel.
"My house is just filed with noise," she added.
Ironically, Kunis' mini-me "likes rope and string. She doesn't really care about anything else."
Kimmel also asked Kunis about Kutcher's ongoing app developments. "People bring more baby things to him, and he kind of just runs them by me. Like, there's these things called Bellabies—I'm not doing an advertisement for anything, by the way!—but you put the little microphone around the belly and you can hear the baby's heartbeat. I think this is awful because unless you know what you're doing, you may not hear the baby's heartbeat and then panic ensues. It's like WebMD but bad. If your baby's like 7 months, you'll hear it anywhere. But if your baby's a little poppy seed, you really have to dig for it. Like, you gotta find that baby heartbeat," she said. "And let me tell you, at 3 months I was like, 'Where is it?!'"
"People run these things by him all the time," she continued. "Listen, when we started dating—this is an awesome story and this is fact!—Tinder hadn't really been out yet. And he was like, 'So, babe, I got this thing that I've been thinking about. You need to do me a favor and download this app.' I was like, 'No problem.' I download Tinder, OK? I was like, 'What is this?' Like, swiping things left and right. I was like, 'This is amazing!' This is stuff that I do at home. He makes me go on all of these websites. Everything!"
"What's the gay version of Tinder?" she asked.
"I mean, I don't know," Kimmel told her.
"Grindr!" Kunis shouted. "I've been on Grindr!"