Comedy CentralDisclaimer: This is a highly subjective list.
Our picks for the top 10 all-time celebrity cameos on The Colbert Report come straight from the heart, the clips being memorable not only for the wattage of the star power but also for the warm-and-fuzzy ways they just made us feel.
Stephen Colbert's Emmy-winning, genre-busting Comedy Central show airs its last tonight, meaning the Brooks Brothers-suited host will be off the grid for some time before he shakes his pundit-spoofing persona and takes over for David Letterman as host of the Late Show. And there are so many ways to celebrate the Report and what Colbert accomplished over the past nine, it's hard to just begin, but...
Begin we will. Watch, laugh, enjoy and know that--while we have complete faith that Colbert and his team will do something phenomenal even within the stricter parameters of the late-night network talk show format--lightening just doesn't strike in the same place twice.
10. David Cross fights for the little guy: Appearing on The Colbert Report in the guise of Russ Lieber, "liberal radio host" and author of Raising Your Voice by Raising Your Hand: A Non-Confrontational Dissenter's Guide to Fighting Back Politely!, the Arrested Development star tries—and can't help but fail—to get a word in edge-wise.
9. Ric Ocasek joins Stephen's commando rescue team: Picked for his "animal magnetism," the Cars frontman is deployed to help rescue Stephen Jr., the eaglet named after the host, from his cage at the San Francisco Zoo. So delightfully random!
8. "Cooking With Feminists": Jane Fonda and Gloria Steinem join Stephen for some pie-baking (all-American apple, of course) and a lesson on the current state of American feminism.
7. Late Night Snack vs. Americone Dream: There is absolutely zero reason to have to choose between Jimmy Fallon's and Stephen's signature Ben & Jerry's ice cream flavors. But we loved watching Stephen hate on Jimmy and Jimmy then showing up to defend his salty-sweet honor. (And pronounce Colbert's name "Stefen.")
6. Patrick Stewart laments his serious case of fisherman's foot: "Actual Louisiana resident" Chuck Dupree ("No, I have never trod the boards") gives a "real" account of his hardships wrought by the Affordable Care Act.
5. Tom Hanks pimps his movies for Halloween: The two-time Oscar winner (mustachioed at the time) acting the pompous thesp to recommend Halloween costumes based on his films was everything. And then Matt Damon showed up for the Saving Private Ryan-themed costumes and the bit was everything-times-two.
4. Jeff Goldblum stands up for flies everywhere: The quirky star lent his support to an outraged Colbert in 2009 when the host slammed the grisly "murder in the White House." (Um, Obama swatted a fly on camera.) "Stephen, thank you so, so much for standing up for a group that has for too long been misunderstood," the star of the 1986 cult-classic The Fly said. It must have been free-spirited bits like this that Goldblum had in mind when he compared working with Colbert to "a hot peach pie cooked in heaven's kitchen." Which is such a Jeff Goldblum-type thing to say.
3. Michael Stipe takes up residence on the shelf: Who else could get the frontman of one of the most globally famous rock bands to pretend that he just hangs out on set all the time?! Stipe first took a seat in 2011 and was "still there" in 2012 when Mandy Patinkin appeared for a holiday-time interview; the Homeland star then joined Colbert and the REM singer for a rendition of "Good King Wenceslas." Better yet, there was Stipe—sittin'—at Colbert's everthing-from-my-studio-must-go fire sale featured on last night's penultimate episode.
2. Stephen, Jon Stewart and Conan O'Brien's late-night brawl: It was always something special when Stewart would stop by, his Daily Show being the comedic well from whence Colbert as we know him sprang. But while he popped up plenty of times, the battle over whether it was Stewart, Colbert or then Late Night host Conan O'Brien who "by the transitive property" created then-GOP presidential candidate Mike Huckabee took synergy to a whole new level. After furiously offering evidence as to whom begot whom and then patiently waiting while one or the other could finish taping his show, they actually took off their belts and shoes in a frenzy. The atmosphere was rich with mock-anger...and the result was epic! (The entire bit transcended networks and timeslots, but here's a fantastic mash-up of how it unfolded, courtesy of Colbert Nation.)
1. The dance party to end all dance parties: After Viacom limited Daft Punk to one company-network appearance (and the winner was the MTV Video Music Awards over the Report), Colbert attempted to appease his StePhest Colbchella '13 sponsors by still offering up the song of the summer. Only instead of a live performance, he just enlisted Hugh Laurie, Jeff Bridges, Bryan Cranston, the Radio City Music Hall Rockettes, Matt Damon, Nick Cannon and the America's Got Talent judges, Jon Stewart, Jimmy Fallon and Henry Kissinger (though the former Secretary of State just sat and looked bemused) for a dance party we kept on our DVRs until...actually, it's still on there.
We miss you already, "Stephen Colbert," and we can't wait to see what Stephen Colbert has up his sleeve for his next chapter in late night. Until then!