Jennifer Lopez Talks Failed Romances, Wishes She "Could Have Held" Marc Anthony Marriage Together

"I've got to hope that if I keep going I will eventually get it right," she tells Elle U.K.

By Zach Johnson Sep 02, 2014 5:45 PMTags
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Jennifer Lopez is ready to settle down—again.

The actress has been married three times, and she wouldn't rule out walking down the aisle once more. "I still believe in love. The nirvana man, he's out there somewhere," the 45-year-old "Booty" singer says in Elle U.K.'s October issue. She adds, "But you just have to work at it. You have to work at everything."

Her ex-husbands include Ojani Noa (1997-1998), Cris Judd (2001-2003) and Marc Anthony (2004-2014). She was also engaged to Ben Affleck and dated Diddy and Casper Smart, among others. "Everybody has seen that I make mistakes. Every single album I have ever made is about love. But I am not going to give up. I have to look at what I do wrong. I rush in, I get swept up, I ignore the signs. But so many of us are guilty of these things. Each time it goes wrong, it's hard. I get really hurt but I have to let myself go: 'What did I do? What can I learn?' And as hard and as hurtful as things get, I want to believe I will be able to go one step higher," she says. "I've got to hope that if I keep going I will eventually get it right."

Lopez isn't bothered by the increased interest in her love life. "Is it worth making mistakes, in my case in public, and trying to figure out what you do and balance everything and constantly grow? I'd say yes," she tells the magazine. "None of it is easy, none of it is safe—you are going to get big highs and you are going to get big lows, so it's not for everyone—but that's exciting. You just need to believe in yourself."

The American Idol judge also opens up about her life as a single mom to 6-year-old twins Emme and Max. "It's not easy. I'm from a traditional background. It takes two people to make a kid for a reason. It's tough because I know they feel the void of that male presence," says Lopez, who was most recently linked to Maksim Chmerkovskiy. "When Marc and I first broke up, I did think, 'I wish I could have held this together.' But when you realize it's not the right thing for anybody, you think, 'OK, well how do we make this work, how do we make this better, how do we make this great for the children anyway?'"

That's where Lopez's family's comes into play.

"My kids go and stay in a one-bedroom apartment in the Bronx all the time, or a studio with their aunts, uncles and cousins and their grandmother. They get it," the New York City native tells Elle U.K. "The great thing about actually becoming successful is that my family—who grew up sharing beds—come and stay, and everyone has their own room and their own shower. My aunts walk around saying, 'Jennifer, you have so many towels.' Everybody in my family always talks about how many towels I have."

The full interview appears in Elle U.K.'s October issue and as a digital edition.