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This Diabolical Panda Allegedly Faked Her Pregnancy to Receive Extra Bamboo and Air Conditioning

Panda McConnell/Toronto Star via Getty Images

(Disclaimer: The gentle giant pictured above is not, in fact, the panda about which this story is written. It's just another precious bamboo-eating bear.)

We're all convinced our pets are the most conniving creatures on the planet. Our dogs fake going to the bathroom to receive extra treats and our cats act suspiciously lazy in hopes of getting a little extra catnip. Well, we're all terribly wrong because our house pets are idiots compared to the sheer brilliance of this panda.

According to AFP, Ai Hin the panda showed signs of being pregnant at the Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding Research Centre in southwestern China. The six-year-old bear's "pregnancy" was detected when zookeepers noticed she was eating less, had less mobility, and experienced a surge of hormones.

The research center often puts pregnant pandas into air-conditioned suites and gives them around-the-clock care. "They also receive more buns, fruits and bamboo, so some clever pandas have used this to their advantage to improve their quality of life," said Wu Kongju, an expert at the center. You sneaky bear!

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After Ai Hin's hormones and behaviors returned to normal, experts decided she had experienced a "phantom pregnancy," which can be common among females of an endangered species.

The Ai Hin pregnancy has affected more than just the panda's lifestyle: She threw a major wrench in some serious plans. A live broadcast of the baby panda's birth was scheduled but had to be canceled because, well, you know. It would have been the first-ever live broadcast of a panda cub's entrance into this world. 

Damn it, Ai Hin. You had one job.

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