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What the Hell Is Going on in This Cristiano Ronaldo Commercial?

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao MTGEC

Celebrities have been known to endorse some pretty questionable products if it means making a quick buck (CLICK! FLASH! WOW!) but what is Cristiano Ronaldo even endorsing here?! This product is questionable insofar as we have literally a million questions. 

And absolutely none of them are answered in the Facial Fitness Pao's commercial. Come, join us on this journey, as we watch the ad and try to figure out what is happening:

Ronaldo is playing with a soccer ball. Is this a soccer-related product?

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao YouTube / MTG _CR

Or are we just trying to establish that Cristiano Ronaldo is a soccer player?

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao YouTube / MTG _CR

Most likely the latter, as Cristiano seems surprised by the product.

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao YouTube / MTG _CR

And if he is a professional soccer player, soccer would not surprise him.

This is what the product does:

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao YouTube / MTG _CR

WATCH: The 9 sexiest moments from Tom Hiddleston's Jaguar commercial

EXCEPT YOU PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH:

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao YouTube / MTG _CR

LOOK. LOOK AT ALL OF THESE PEOPLE AND WHAT THEY'RE DOING:

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao YouTube / MTG _CR

That is what you do with this product that makes you, "Shape up, face up!"

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao YouTube / MTG _CR

Whatever that means. And it either hurts you or this girl is not a great actress.

Thanks to FreeTranslation.com's Japanese to English capabilities, we are able to deduce that the Facial Fitness Pao is, "One of the best in the world, but to smile train. Twice a day from 30 seconds for intensive training!"

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao YouTube / MTG _CR

It's worth pointing out that Cristiano Ronaldo refuses to put that thing in his mouth and have himself photographed flapping his face up and down to...make his smile bigger? Better? Faster? Stronger?

But maybe it does work, since he wasn't making this face:

Cristiano Ronaldo, Facial Fitness Pao

Can anyone tell us what is going on in this commercial?!

PHOTOS: Check out more hot men in ads (for less weird products)

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