How ya doin', Supernatural fans? Are you struggling to breathe, or are you so used to the brothers dying and then not dying at this point that you're just like, "whatevs, no big deal?" That was a pretty great finale, either way, and it was accompanied by some pretty big stuff in the reality TV world, including the season finales of The Voice and Dancing with the Stars. Plus, some housewives got into some arguments, and American Idol geared up to crown its own winner. Here's what went down.
American Idol: We'd like to declare Jena Irene the obvious winner, based solely on her encore performance of "Can't Help Falling In Love." Yeah, we're obsessed with it. So what? You're probably obsessed with something that is way less flawless. We just love almost everything this girl does. That's not to say Caleb Johnson doesn't also have a pretty impressive set of pipes. We liked his performance of "Maybe I'm Amazed," and he's definitely got some rockery hair, but he does not have the chills-giving factor (we will NOT say "goosies") that Jena brings to the stage almost every time she steps onto it. It could be anyone's game based on feedback from the judges, so we'll just have wait with baited breath (for three million fluff-filled hours) to find out who will walk away with this year's title.
Supernatural: Let this be a warning to everyone trying to be in charge of anything, especially if they don't deserve to be in charge of said thing: Do not have an intercom system that easily allows you to communicate with everyone you are in charge of. That intercom system will accidentally or strategically be left on, and all your dirty secrets will be revealed. That's exactly what happened to Metatron tonight, and it turned out to be his downfall. After Cas healed Gadreel, Gadreel got them both into Heaven (using the foolproof Wookie method), and then promptly locked up in magical heavenly jail cells. This problem was quickly fixed, however, when Gadreel sacrificed himself by using his suicide bombing abilities to blow up the magical heavenly jail cells, allowing Cas to sneak into Metatron's office.
Meanwhile, Marv (as Metatron shall know be known) was disguised as a homeless miracle worker down on earth when Dean came to visit, and the two had a little scuffle that ended in Dean getting stabbed through the heart. Sam rushed to his side, but it was a bit too late, and Dean seemed to be beyond help. Marv disappeared, and reappeared in his office, where Cas was waiting for him. He then made the mistake a thousand other villains have made, and spouted a nice little recap of his own shenanigans, then looked over to discover that the light on his intercom system was a nice bright green.
So Cas now seems to be in charge of Heaven, and Dean is dead. Or is he? While Sam begged for Crowley to appear and make him a deal for Dean's life, Crowley appeared by the dead brother's bedside to explain a little loophole he forgot to mention. Apparently, Cane's way of escaping the effects of the First Blade involved stabbing himself to death, but the mark wouldn't quite let him go. So Crowley put the blade in Dean's hand, and told him to open his eyes – he did, but they were cold and black, and clearly not Jensen Ackles real, beautiful eyes. Darn you, summer! We don't want to wait to find out what happens next!
Line of the night: "Guess I've been Winchestered."—Crowley, after Sam takes his place in Dean's quest to destroy Metatron
Real Housewives of New York: Tonight, the ladies sat around and traded presents that they lovingly made for one another, while they showered each other with compliments and hugs. Just kidding, they all got into a catfight! The housewives were a bit miffed after Ramona ditched them in the Berkshires to go to a party, so they trapped her on the inside of a booth and confronted her, leading to one of those things you really don't see every day: Ramona apologizing. It wasn't the most sincere apology in the world, but it was something, which is more than you usually get from her.
Later, Ramona and Kristen went out for tea and more apologies, but Kristen wasn't buying it. The two only argued more and started hurling insults, leaving things even worse than they were when the tea began.
Other things that happened: Heather asked for a bit of Kristen's son's ice cream, and it was odd. The ladies also did some hungover yoga, which was funny, and Josh and Kristen had a sad fight that involved him criticizing her for not cooking him dinner, so he can basically leave.
So what did you watch tonight? Who should win American Idol? What do you think evil-eyed Dean will be like? Was Ramona's apology even remotely real? What's your favorite kind of cheese? Take it to the comments and let us know!