It's a tale as old as time: Christopher Meloni goes on a late night show and says that he has the "best ass on primetime." We launch a full investigation to verify his claims and discover that, in fact, Orphan Black's Dylan Bruce has The Best Ass on Primetime (all caps, because it's an official title now).
"What an honor to be bestowed on me!" Dylan told us when we presented the award. "I mean, thank you so much. I've worked really hard in the off-season, so to see my work come to fruition like that is a great honor."
Bruce, who plays the most appropriately named Hot Paul (born, Paul Dierden), has a butt that is both inspirational and ass-pirational. To earn the distinction of top bottom, Dylan beat out the likes of True Blood's Joe Manganiello, White Collar's Matt Bomer and Scandal's Tony Goldwyn.
"I kind of feel like I'm the new girl who comes to high school and everybody is intrigued with her," he continued. "So I feel very honored. But I don't think that I necessarily am the best butt."
The Best Ass on Primetime is humble, too!
Hot Paul put his best butt forward during the first season of Orphan Black, and though that butt has yet to make a guest appearance during this second season, our dear friends over at TV Scoop tell us that will change in this week's episode (the butt's back! And then some!) Oh, and in our exclusive clip, Felix calls him "Big Dick Paul," so apparently he has that going for him, too!
As for the secret to achieving that beauteous gluteus maximus, Dylan reveals, "Apparently the hockey butt is the butt to be desired nowadays, so I guess I'll start picking up ice hockey in my down time as well as squats and lunges. That's total commitment, 110 percent!"
And, should it come to it, he's ready to defend his title: "I know for sure the competition is going to be gunning for me next year, so it just means that I have to start skating more and playing more hockey.
"Watch out True Blood actors, I'm coming for you again next year."
—Reporting by Leanne Aguilera