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Here's the poop: An unknown assailant in Texas is defecating on people's front lawns and leaving it for the homeowner to clean (along with the accompanying toilet paper, which he also brings). 

Last night, Anderson Cooper reported on this very important news story via his Ridiculist. Which meant we were treated to 147 seconds of uninterrupted, uncensored, Anderson Cooper poop puns. Can you watch the entire video and not laugh? Time to take the ultimate Cooper Pooper Pun Test:

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN

Have you cracked a smile?

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN

Have you stifled a giggle?

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN

Have you actually LOLed?

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN

That's it! Did you make it?

Yeah, we didn't either...

Anderson Cooper, The Ridiculist

CNN