Are you ready to meet the Chrisley family? Because they are ready to meet you.
USA's new reality series Chrisley Knows Best premieres tonight and it just might be your new small screen obsession. You can learn about the family and the show here, but the gist is that this Atlanta brood is rich, sassy and run with an iron fist by quote-machine and self-made multimillionaire Todd Chrisley.
We've seen the series premiere episode, and instead of just talking about what happens or what to expect, we thought we'd have a bit more fun and reveal a bunch of quotes that come from the first episode. Of course, we left some parts of the quote blank so you'll have to tune in to hear what was really said. Or you can use your imagination and fill in the blanks yourself! No surprise here, all of these quotes are from the main man himself, Todd Chrisley.
Ready? Let's play Chrisley Knows Best fill in the blank game!
Savannah: "Well, you just think you're all that and a bag of chips and some more!"
Todd: "I'm breakfast, lunch and dinner and [blank] twice a week."
Todd on Savannah's clothes: "She goes from Virgin Mary to [blank]. We need to find a happy medium."
Todd: "We spend [blank], sometimes more, on clothing each year."
Todd: "There's a lot of [blank] involved with Chrisley & Company. Not that I have one."
Todd: "You really think when Chase tells me at 16-years-old 'Oh, I'm going to bed at 8:30?' Bulls--t. He's going to [blank] or doing something he's not supposed to be doing."
Todd: "At the end of the day, he who has the [blank], rules. I have the [blank]. They don't."
Todd (seeing Savannah in a skimpy dress): "Oh, my God. You look like a young version of [blank]."
Todd on his 22-year-old son Kyle: "When I caught Kyle [blank], I had his ass picked up by two private security guards. He was taken to the private airstrip here in Atlanta and he was sent to Samoa for nine months to do Red Cross relief work."
Todd: "Ignorance I can fix. [Blank] is forever."
No blanks for this last one. We just want to announce that Grayson Chrisley, age 7, says this to his mom in the car on the way from school:
"I wanna go to Hooters! I wanna see some hot girls!"
Ladies and gents, the Chrisley family!
Tune in tonight at 10 p.m. on USA to watch the series premiere of Chrisley Knows Best. And don't forget, reruns follow on E! on Sundays at 10:30 p.m. starting on March 16. You will not be bored.
(E! and USA are both part of the NBCUniversal family.)