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Justified's Murderous Premiere Mission, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Reveals How Coulson Lived and More OMG TV Moments

Justified Guy D'Alama/FX

Warning: We're about to run down the biggest TV moments from Tuesday night. If you don't want to be spoiled on a particular show, skip to the next!

Justified: He's ba-ack! After far too many months everyone's favorite U.S. Marshal Raylan Givens is back and ready to eff things up! (Pardon our harsh implied language; we're pretty excited here.) The season five premiere opened with Dewey Crowe winning $300 thousand dollars in court due to Raylan's, ahem, somewhat impolite police tactics. (He beat the crap outta Dewey and we're glad he did.) But Raylan's mission this episode was to find Dewey's cousin Dilly (yes, that's his actual name) because the hilariously-named dude and his Cuban accomplice killed a drug smuggling Coast Guard officer.
 
By the end of the 75 minute premiere, Dilly was murdered by his fellow Crowe brothers (pun intended) and his accomplice Elvis attempted a short yet deadly swim to Cuba. Raylan ended the episode by video chatting with his former lady love and his darling baby daughter. FYI they live in Miami now.  Over in Harlan, Boyd is trying to secure safety for his jail-bound fiancé Ava and he is willing to kill as many people to get it, including Judge Bishop's buddy Lee Paxton. In a heartwarming twist, Boyd decided not to kill the man's Latvian wife who blatantly witnessed the entire murder. Aww, is Boyd getting a conscience this season? We think so…

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Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: You asked for an answer and you finally got it on the ABC hit series as we finally learned just how in the heck Coulson came back to life after dying in The Avengers. (Sobbing over it still, TBH!) Turns out, our leader never actually went to Tahiti, the island, but to an operating room known as Tahiti in which Dr. Streiten attempted to save  his life "for days" on orders from Nick Fury. 

It took a reluctant Streiten seven surgeries to save Coulson, who had clearly lost the will to live, asking the doc to let him die. In order to preserve the Coulson we all know and love, better memories were implanted into his brain, which is why he doesn't remember anything. (We also learned that Coulson's father died in front of him and that he also lost his mother. Awww, don't you just want to give him a big ol' hug?!)

Were you satisfied with the answer to S.H.I.E.L.D.'s burning mystery? Or do you think there's more to the story?

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New Girl Adam Taylor/FOX

Cougar Town: Awww-blech! Tonight's premiere gifted us with that new sound, which was created by Ellie in response to Laurie and Travis' new relationship since the cul de sac had no words to describe their thoughts the new coupling. (Things got super-awk when Jules walked in on them in the shower. And promptly fell into the shower.) Oh, and the TBS hit also blessed us with "Naked, Sexy, Touchy-Grabby" aka the catchiest song since The Good Wife's "Thicky Trick." We missed this show so.

The Mindy Project: It's like the show is a carriage driver, we are the horse pulling said carriage and the idea of a Danny and Mindy relationship is the carrot being dangled in front of our faces. And we kind of love it. Come on, how can you not root for these two when, after seeing her naked, Danny tells a slightly insecure Mindy just to stop sucking her stomach in. "You're a woman and that's good; look like a woman," he says, causing us to spill onto our floors like a popsicle melting on the Fourth of July. (Line of the night? Always so hard to choose, but we'll got with Mindy's "Over the holidays I had five hams and a goose like I am a wolf in a children's story.")

New Girl: Holy Nick Miller reveal, Batman! In tonight's flashback-heavy (aka awesome) ep, it was revealed that Nick actually bassed the bar exam and could've been a lawyer if he wanted to. And hey, he still could, but he seems totally content to keep bartending right now, so you do you, Miller. Another reveal? Coach's birth name: Ernie! Hey, at least Coach got the line of the night with this gem: "I don't watch movies. I time them."

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Pretty Little Liars ABC FAMILY/Ron Tom

Pretty Little Liars: Welcome back to Rosewood, PLL fans. Tonight's episode picked up just a week after our little liars discovered that Ali has actually been alive this entire time, and to put it lightly, the girls were pretty damn pissed. We've got all the scoop on tonight's jaw-dropping and heart-breaking (RIP Haleb!) moments plus exclusive scoop on what's ahead. What are you waiting for? Read our Pretty Little Liars post-mortem right here!

Ravenswood: Tonight's winter premiere was filled with thrills, chills, and brand-new information about the Ravenswood curse. Here's how it all went down: Way back in 1917 the townsfolk of Ravenswood were outraged (and kind of overreacting) that the USA was going to war. In order to save the soldiers leaving their town, the elders used some kind of voo-doo, witchcraft magic to sacrifice five children whenever a war is declared. Pretty harsh, no? In a shocking twist, the two men spearheading the brigade of crazy was original Caleb and Miranda's dads!

And in other spooky news: Caleb revealed to Miranda that he broke up with Hanna, Miranda mastered her ghostly scare tactics to torment Mrs. Grunwald, and it appears that Olivia went all the way with her ultra-creepy boyfriend Dylan. Oh and apparently Mrs. Grunwald has some kind of attack-ghost who will torture Miranda if she ever tries to hurt the old lady again. Just another typical crazy night in Ravenswood!

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