Golf is rife with enough double entendres to "cleverly" snicker about this story for years to come: A 23-year-old woman streaked during last weekend's Presidents Cup tournament in Dublin, Ohio.
(Balls, shaft, hole-in-one, etc. Mix and match for the perfect headline!)
Kim Webster stole the show when she sprinted across the 18th green at the Muirfield Village Golf Club wearing a red thong and patriotic, red, white and blue faux pasties (later, she would clarify that they were "scrapbooking stickers").
Boston's WZLX tracked down Kim this morning to get her side of the story.
"The day before, it started as a joke. I mentioned it and thought it'd be funny," she told radio DJs Karlson and Mackenzie. "I got home, did some research on the top streakers of all time and they seemed to be all men. I thought, let's try to change this."
She continued, "This will be funny. This will be epic. It's internationally broadcasted...I just wish I had the flag the whole time."
That American flag became a casualty of the streaking when cops managed to wrangle it from Kim, who continued running.
(WARNING: You can't make out much, but the below video is potentially NSFW.)
"I was trying to make it the full length of the hole. I work hard, I don't work out hard, so I took a left and beelined it for the woods," Kim recalled. "I couldn't just stop there." As for the crowd's reaction? "They were just screaming, 'USA! USA!'"
"I'm actually living with my grandmother...She thought it was funny," Kim added with a laugh. "My mom, on the other hand, wasn't too happy, which I can understand why."
The police, on the other other hand, weren't as upset as you might think.
"They did end up getting me yesterday," Kim confessed, nixing rumors that she managed to sneak out of the club. "They brought me in, I wasn't in handcuffs or anything. I walked away with a $100 misdemeanor. It's rough, I'm trying to raise money for it actually."
That said, America did win the cup. And Kim will go down in sports history not only as a female streaker, but one of the most infamous, ballsiest streakers, period. Dreams do come true, kids.