We dare you to get through this list without falling in love with Mila Kunis.
1. She was in a Lisa Frank commercial in the early '90s.
2. She isn't afraid to get her PDA on with boyfriend Ashton Kutcher.
3. She speaks fluent Russian. A power she uses for good and not evil. Like defending Justin Timberlake against reporters in Moscow.
4. But she still thinks Russian sounds like Klingon.
5. Because she's adorable being interviewed by awkward interviewers.
6. She likes crêpes.
Like, a lot, it seems.
7. She voices Meg on Family Guy.
8. No really, she's the voice of Meg. And she loves it.
9. She makes for one hell of a Wicked Witch.
Even if the rest of the movie wasn't so great.
10. Which is cool considering the first book she read in English was Return to Oz. And she was the understudy to Glinda the Good Witch in her 4th grade play.
11. She lied about her age to book That 70's Show.
She said she was "legally emancipated or 18." She wasn't either.
12. Because a Marine asked her out via YouTube and she said yes.
13. And then she actually went out with him. Mila was Sgt. Scott Moore's date for the Marine Corps Ball in Greenville, N.C.
For the record, he said she was a "blast."
14. She inspired the stupidest meme on the Internet: Mila and Words. Which is just pictures of Mila Kunis and words.
15. Because this is what she had to say about appearing on Baywatch as a kid: "I was on Baywatch twice. The second time, I played a blind girl who's lost in the forest next to the beach and needs to be saved. It was absurd: There's a fire, I get saved, and then I go boogie-boarding. I remember thinking, 'Well, if I'm blind, how am I boogie-boarding?' No one ever gave me an answer."
16. She was blind in one eye for many years and no one knew.
She's not anymore.
17. She's friends with a literal princess.
Princess Beatrice, to be exact. And they vacation together in St. Tropez.
18. She was adorable in Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
19. She was adorable in Ted.
20. She was adorable in this video of her eating at a Dodger's game.
21. She was terrifying...but sexy...but terrifying...but sexy! in Black Swan.
22. She's pretty all made up.
23. She's pretty without makeup.
24. She's really, really pretty when she goes to the Oscars.
One of our favorite gowns in Oscar history.
25. Which is all probably because she's the Sexiest Woman Alive.
According to Esquire, at least.
26. Even though she's the Sexiest Woman Alive, she's modest about it.
"I showed side boob. I don't need to show ass," she's said about stripping down for movies. "You get one or the other. You don't need both."
"If I ever, even for a second, started getting a big head, I was brought back to reality pretty quickly. I was working full time and still had to fight for a cellphone. Then the car thing came around. Oh my God! You would have thought I was asking for a private jet! I kicked and screamed and I got my stupid car. Then I did something dumb and my parents took my keys away. I told them, 'But I have to go to work tomorrow!' And they said, 'You'll figure it out.' Yeah, those are my parents—and that's why I'm pretty grounded."
28. She's super close to her parents still and regularly hangs out with them.
29. Because she's Mila frickin' Kunis.
30. And because it's her birthday! Happy Birthday, Mila!
We love you!