Taylor Swift is currently single. But if she has a thing for men twice her age who enjoy sniffing girls' hair—and if the Internet has its way—she might soon be meeting the man of her dreams.
Boston's Kiss 108 radio station is currently holding a contest to find Taylor Swift's No. 1 fan and the winner will receive two (2) tickets to her upcoming show, will meet Taylor and have his or her picture taken with Taylor.
To win, all you have to do is explain in 137 character or less why you deserve the prize. Charles Z. did just that: "I'm a 39 year old man and I love Taylor so much and don't care that both adults and children mock me for it. But I feel 22 if that helps."
Kinda sweet, actually!
One of Charles friends wasn't confined to 137 characters though and expanded upon why he deserved to win: "A local radio station has a contest going to give some lucky teeny bopper a chance to meet [Taylor Swift]," he wrote on 4chan, an anonymous message board that some might describe as the depths of Internet Hell.
"My creepy 39 year old friend named Charles would like to crush all those girls dreams (and then sniff Taylor Swifts hair cuz he's into that), by winning this instead," he continued. "Help him crush the dreams of these girls and give him a chance to make a complete ass of himself by blatantly just sniffing her hair with cameras rolling."
Charles (a "fat old guy creep") was in 25th place of over 3,7000 fans in the running when the message was posted. Then 4chan latched on to the cause and within 24 hours, Charles was in first place.
There is nothing in the official contest rules that disqualifies "fat old guy creeps" (the only age specification is that applicants must be 13-years or older, which 39 is), but what is grounds for disqualification is "receiv[ing] multiple and/or irregular votes from the same user or users."
Beyond simply throwing their manically devoted manpower behind Charles, 4chan allegedly wrote a script that automates the voting process using 500 different computers from around the world.
The contest ends this Sunday, July 21. If all goes according to (4chan's) plan, Taylor's ballad about Charles Z., "You Smell Like Your Mom's Basement" could appear on her next album, release TBD.