Close
BRAND NEW ON E!
  • News/ 

    Demi Lovato: I Wanted to Kill Myself at Age 7

    Demi Lovato, Cosmopolitan Magazine Matt Jones/Cosmopolitan Magazine

    On Cosmopolitan's latest cover, Demi Lovato is the definition of confidence. The now blond star flaunts her blue lace bra under a plunging mini.

    But becoming comfortable in her own skin was a long journey.

    NEWS: Demi still has nightmares about childhood bullying

    Inside the August issue the star talks candidly about her tough past, which began with her first gig on Barney & Friends.

    "At the time I was just so grateful to be on TV, but I was also really struggling," the now 20-year-old reveals. "Even before Barney, I was suicidal. I was 7."

    The star says although she has opened up about her teenage struggles such as bulimia, cutting and even her bipolar disorder, she hasn't shared much about her early years.

    "I've talked about being bullied and the years of being a teenager, but I went through things when I was younger that I've never talked about that probably caused me to turn out the way I ended up turning out."

    NEWS: Demi talks being bipolar, changing hair color

    Demi Lovato, Cosmopolitan Magazine Matt Jones/Cosmopolitan Magazine

    For now the singer says she's concentrating on her future, which includes a major milestone: her 21stbirthday.

    "I look at birthdays as celebrating another year of life," she says. "You've made it another year. An entire year. Some people don't make it to 21."

    NEWS: Demi resurfaces in L.A. after father's death

    Sadly the former Disney star is extra sensitive to just how fragile life can be. Her father, Patrick, passed away last week at the age of 54.

    Demi had been estranged from him for a few years even singing about their strained relationship in the 2011 song "For the Love of a Daughter."

    The X Factor judge first took to her Twitter to thank fans for their support and then followed with a few heartfelt thoughts:

    "Today I put my Daddy to rest. . .Hardest thing I've ever done. . . But I know great things will come of this. . ." she shared. "There's an overwhelming sense of peace knowing my Dad is know longer battling his demons anymore an that makes me so happy."

    PHOTOS: Child stars that turned out all right

    RELATED VIDEOS:

    FROM AROUND THE WEB
    MORE ON EONLINE

    Ouch!

    Katy Perry pierces her nose—watch what happens!